Choking for a rebound/pityshag Wid Ye?

™

 

Says Europes biggest **** <ooooook>

 

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He looks ****ing miserable. "What have I done?!"

 

Did that already, dumbass.

 

I'm choking to hear this woman's voice now

I bet she has a sort of Home Counties generic middle class accent with a slight Sussex-y country girl homeliness about it.

I bet her voice is all fluffy sounding and like a friendly Primary One teacher.


...then I'll make her growl like beelzebub when her back pipe is straining to fit the helmet.

Ooooft, turning round, cheeks aw ran mascara and hate-filled lust in her eyes.

Ding dong.

 

Strangely, I'm all moist now....

 

I worry about two things.

1. Where your ****in mind gets to.
2. Your poor ****in wife.

 

I'd make sure that lassie never made a sound on the bog ever again

She widnae even need to force a jobby out.

She'd get ten seconds warning then they'd fall out of her ruined chuffpiece

 

Keep talking bib ahm getting some good ****ing material here.

 

Read somewhere at the weekend that they used to fight like **** every Sunday, her squealing like a maniac. Sunday Times I think.

 

I may have ruined both of these heightened sexual senses with the jobby/collapsed anus comment


...or made you both come


Whatever gets ye aff

 

Shhh boys, no more talk of broken marriages, Jip's on the thread

 

**** sake where do I sign up?

 

Go on...

 

I'm not sure whether this thread is the funniest thing I've seen in a whie or the most disturbing thing I've read since Medro said he had a sex life (wonlt someone think of the children) ........

 

Well, it's summat to do on those long Sunday afternoons before ye nip doon the pub for your end of weekend binge.

 

That was done last week, with the Runaway Wid ye.

 

Aye, pay attention, Dan, ya fanny

 

Couldn't do that for some reason

 

I'm beeling now