Ooooooohhh, I've heavy varied with age. Used to do about one toaly a week but now I'm a once a day keecher. If I do more than two in a day, I get big hefty piles.
I average at one a day, though sometimes 2 and sometimes none. Anyone who ****s more than 2wice a day takes it up the arse according to this article in Mens Health
You can see where the piles come from, then I never thought that the bum-pummelings could be causing it...
I'm usually once a day and, very occasionally, twice a day. I don't think I've ever had to go more than that unless I've got the 2 bob bits. I suspect these multi-visit merchants are making fleeting visits and aren't fully unloading. I take a book or a crossword in with me and spend a good 15 - 20 mins on the ****ter.
No, I'm in and out 5 mins tops. In, do the business, get to ****. Who the **** wants to wallow in the aroma of their own faeces reading books? Fuck that ****.
Don't forget to examine your handiwork. Your **** is a reasonable indicator of the general health of your digestive tract.
Sometimes it takes 15 mins to wipe my arse clean. Even more so when I have the grapes of wrath, more surface area to clean then.
Normally 1 a day ... I always take in something to read! Right now, my '****e' book is Super Freakanomics - intresting stuff.
Sometimes I'll go three days without one, then do two or three in a day. No real pattern to my ****es, apart from that I rarely ever crap before 12pm.
Sorry to have to tell you that Alf but look on the positive side. I have been known to be incorrect in my diagnosis from time to time, anyhow modern surgery techniques together with new drugs make it quite curable if treated early.
