The genuine homeless I really feel for but the ones who have a bit of cash aside and choose to live rough... and then spank said cash on booze and drugs I have little sympathy for long term. We all have bad spells but it is how you manage your life long term I think that marks us out.
I'm yet to find a beer I like. There's very little alcoholic stuff I'm into. I personally like to drink strong stuff, so I can get the buzz and **** early on, and not have digest too much of the carbonated **** that comes with beer and fizzy drinks and stuff. I personally drink 2-3 quadroople vodka and cokes. I'm trying to enjoy just whiskey and Vodka by itself, but it tastes ****ty.
You know what Tash.. Guinnes is a good starter. it's like a meal and goes down soo smooth. AB will back me up on that one.
I have a theory about drinking (Law 1): When people drink more than a little, they invariably become babbling morons (oh we're going to win the league are we? Ahhhh, it will be easier with Messi in the squad yes, I'm sure Mike is all over that deal... Oh and I love you too, even though we were introduced into a typically awkward social situation by the mutual friend who's obviously ****ed off about ten minutes ago, and I've spent most of that time trying to get you to stop groping me in the arse... even though you're a dude!!!!), and thus we decide we need to drink so as to bare it... Nothing strange about this theory, until it comes to my 2nd Law... Feck off as early as possible, preferably before everyone has reached the state of puking through their fingers into their drinks (yayyy... it's like second drink!) and contemplating the more profound reasons for our existence... Having said that, Law 3 states that having more than a few of those delightful double whiskey and cokes before matchday is quite spiffing, and warms the idiotic vocal chords... Luckily I sit behind the goalie, so the opposition keepers always benefits from my drunken musings on the abyss of life...
I dunno, I don't fall over and ****, I just become more confident to express myself, and slur my speech a bit.
Speaking of being drunk, I was on a kayak trip in Scotland recently, and a mate got a bit *cough* lot *cough* drunk and started leaping a campfire in his boxers. Needless to say he had a few less pubes afterwards...
Tash, have you ever thought that just pissing yourself represented a viable alternative to the inconvenience of having to drag yourself to the toilet, and potentially miss your mates inane story of the last time they got herpes (even though they're clearly a virgin)? If not, I applaud you on not having the same standards of drunkenness as me... Also on not having my friends
