http://uk.tv.yahoo.com/blog/article/416920/everybodys-talking-about-naked-office.html Definitely not in my office. Venom, what about your rig
Aye, that would make this place so much more bearable. Loads of fat Geordies and Yorkshiremen walking about in the buff.
I would do it, but only if it was a day only me, the huge titted secretary and a few birds from finance were in. There's only a few women in my department and they are without exception a truely horrendous looking bunch of old saggy tarts
Still better than here ML. Last thing anyone needs to see is the low-hanging, sweaty bawsack of a 63 year old pipe-fitter.
Yeah, although the if you work offshore for long enough the law of averages says that eventually you'll have to see an auld mannie's bawsack. Sharing cabins is ****. About 2 years ago I was on the BG Armada and finished my shift after a 14 hour graft, went to my cabin and the old **** I was sharing with was sitting in his bunk having a tug to porn. I wasn't happy and told the **** that he can have a **** in the toilet like the rest of us.
Aye, the difference between offshore and most other job is that when your shift ends you can go home and not have to deal with the clatty, horrible bastards you work with. Whereas offshore you have to share a tiny little cabin with them. There was one guy who had the remote for the telly sitting on his dirty scuds. Fair enough if you want to be a minging **** in your own home but don't subject others it.
It does my nut in Nev. Some of these ****s act like ****ing weans when they get out here, letting the cleaners and domestic staff do everything for them. Some folk are too lazy to take thier dirty towels to the laundry so just throw them in the corridor when nobody is about. The platform isn't even that big it takes about a minute at the most to walk from your cabin to the laundry room.
there was a guy with adhd in my platoon and the wee dickhead was always ****ing himself off, "anyone got any wetwipes?", "why?", "i just blew ma load in ma trousers eh" this was about 5 minutes after a contact had died down. the trick was generally to ignore the wee **** (no amount of kickings ever seemed to make a difference), was sitting on my cap cot playing cards with another lad and he wanders in from having a wash baw naked and sits down next to us and starts playing with himself we were so used to it we just ignored him until he starts shouting for tissues, then punched the wee **** in the face. he used to think it was hilarious to climb into your bed and have a **** when you went there until i caught him in the act, picked him up by the wrist and an ankle (he's a wee runt) and threw him head first into one of the supports for the tent. wee bastard
Aye, it's pretty close actually. Although they've got better cabins than I do out here. You know those tiny rooms in a caravan that's pretty much just bunk-beds, well add a sink and a couple of wardrobes and that's it. I always think of it as a really **** Blade Runner or similar 80's Sci-Fi film, all bare pipes and dark corridors.
he's just not right nev. before we went into babaji he shaved off his eyebrows. this was because he thought he might as well because he'd put shaving foam on them because at the time he was dancing about pretending to be santa he was always half blind because of all the sweat in his eyes. he was caught ****ing one night when we were sitting in an ambush, i couldn't even count the amount of times he got decked/booted/headbutted for his freakish behaviour. Thank **** i'm away from the wee mutant.
he was never that logical nev this might sound daft but he was always starting fights he could never win and we came to the conclusion it was because he wanted to be the centre of attention so bad he was willing to take a doing for it one of the last times i saw him he'd wound a lad in my tent up to the point where the guy was stamping on him (think i was reading a book) and one of the other guys looks at me (i was the only nco in the room) and goes to break it up, "give him another minute woody, he's not quite done", woody sits back down. by the end of tour the ****ing/screaming/jumping about like a wean was getting a bit old
