You are in bed with the girl of your dreams on one side and a ***got on the other side ... Who do you turn your back on ?
I'm afraid your conundrum doesn't work in England because to us a gay club is: please log in to view this image As in: "I say missus, those ***gots are well gay".
Ooooft, that's a **** of a decision! just one question though, why would a straight bloke want to share the same bed as a marmite miner?