WHEN ENGINEERS GO TO HELL. An engineer dies and reports to the Pearly Gates. Saint Peter checks his dossier and, not seeing his name there, accidentally sends him to Hell. It doesn’t take long before the engineer becomes rather dissatisfied with the level of comfort in Hell. He soon begins to design and build improvements. Shortly thereafter, Hell has air conditioning, flush toilets and escalators. Needless to say, the engineer is a pretty popular guy. One day, God calls Satan and says with a sneer: So, how are things in Hell? Satan replies: Hey, things are going great. We’ve got air conditioning, flush toilets, and escalators. And there’s no telling what this engineer is going to come up with next. What! God exclaims: You’ve got an engineer? That’s a mistake, he should never have been sent to Hell. Send him to me. Not a chance, Satan replies: I like having an engineer on the staff, and I’m keeping him! God insists: Send him back or I’ll sue! Satan laughs uproariously and answers: Yeah, right. And where are you going to get a lawyer? NOW TAKE A MIUTE TO THINK ABOUT IT? GOT IT ? OVER THE HEEDS OF TOONIES I EXPECT, then again you have to be in or have been in work to appreciate.
You guys are engineers? Nice one. I did a degree in Civil Engineering (although can't get a job in that field for love nor money)
Did you serve your time in the army marra? Mechanical engineer mate, the elite of the tradesmen. Don't let them twatting sparkies tell you owt else.
A mate sent these yesterday. Oldies but still funny (sorry to any Micks & Paddys out there ) Paddy & Mick find three hand grenades, so they take them to a police station. Mick: "What if one explodes before we get there?" Paddy: "We'll lie and say we only found two." Joe says to Paddy: "Close your curtains the next time you're having sex wij your wife. The whole street was watching and laughing at you yesterday." Paddy says, "Well the jokes on them, cos' I wasn't even at home yesterday!" Mick walks into Paddy's barn and catches him dancing naked and playing with himself in front of a tractor. Mick says, "B' Jesus Paddy, what ya doing?" Paddy says, "Well me and Mary haven't been getting on in the bedroom lately & the therapist recommended I do something sexy to attracter..... Paddy says to Mick - "I'm ready for a holiday, only this year I'm going to do it a bit different. Three years ago I went to Spain and Mary got pregnant. Two years ago I went to Italy and Mary got pregnant. Last year I went to Majorca and Mary got pregnant." Mick asks - "So what are you going to do this year?". Paddy replies, - "I'll take her with me!" Paddy says to Mick, "Christmas is on a Friday this year". Mick says "Let's hope it's not the 13th." Paddy's in the bathroom and Murphy shouts to him. "Did you find the shampoo?" Paddy says, "yes but it's for dry hair and I've just wet mine."
F ucked if I know. A perv ? I just forwarded the email. Not smart like is me Ps: Just had a thought - Tom in disguise?
Billy nearly fourteen years in the mob [ RAF ] A/C , LAC, SAC, JT, CPL. aircraft technician gas turbines. now. self employed. Airframes, sheet metal, structures, engines. long life of learning curves Bill.
I done 12 with honerable discharge. Lathe & milling work, love owt like that, working to small tolerances. Can work in thous or milli's. Nee bother to me like.
Good idea! Assuming they would want someone out of the loop for 3 years.... My knowledge is quickly dissipating!
Close tollerance is the only way you get satisfaction in your work Bill, anybody can do a job, but fine definition , is all in my book.
Will give it a go. There is an army/mod headquarters near where I work. Could pop in and see what they say. Cheers Billy.
