We all take our health and fitness for granted really. Another example I have is Mrs L's brother - four and a bit years ago he had some stomach aches which he ignored, then he went to the doctors when they persisted, eventually they sent him for tests and diagnosed pancreatic cancer - that was on a Tuesday so we planned to go to visit (when I finished work) that weekend but he died on the Friday. If you want a lethal cancer that is the one - before it "shows" it has spread and riddled your body. I now advise my kids - do the job you enjoy rather than as I did and do one that made money without me ever really liking it. Mrs L and I now try to live so that we will not regret any days lost on things that are not important to us. I have to say that living here in (this week) hot and sunny Wales (can you say that?) with our sheep, shetland ponies, chickens, pigs, dog and cats we have a great time - and the surrounding countryside and coasts are so beautiful.
aw bum, bad timing! apparently not, my brother is cabbie and he's keeping a sharp look out. Everyone is panic buying...the garage round the corner from me is an Esso Garage...it's a bit of a worry, but i have two full petrol cans in my boot now...and my car stinks! lol got mine too ))
Totally agree with Leo about doing a job you enjoy rather than chasing the dosh ,I have made that error too and warned the kids not to fall into that trap.
I am very sorry to hear that Leo. I went through the same with my Grandma. She was diagnosed with a brain tumor and was given only months to live. So we decided to move her from Spain into our dining room so that she could be with her family and was not alone. Also the health care is 100x's better over here as you can imagine. So she was living with us and seemed to be getting slightly better, as she had had a stroke she was unable to move the right side of her body and was confined to a wheelchair. However she was still happy and laughing as ever. After a 370 days she decided that as she was well enough she would get her husband to rent a flat in Luton where the other half of my family is and they would live there. So they moved in and after a few months her health started to deteriorate again. Eventually she passed away peacefully one night with her husband and one of her daughters by her side. I remember being told the news as i walked in from university one day. However, she had defied all the doctors estimates and lived for more than a year longer than they expected (she never was one to do as she was told). So remember, these things are not certain, im sure Mrs L is a fighter and will not give up! I know a friend whose Grandma did the same, she walked into the hospital for a check up one day and the Dr said to her "Mrs Hargreaves? What are you doing here?" She lived for nearly two years after that same Dr had said she would pass away. Miracles do happen and they are more common than we think. Keep your head up and keep fighting. I really hope she pulls through.
All I can say is carpe dium every dium!!!!! This life is the real thing not a rehearsal, every day is a one off and do with it what you want to remember having done. Yes we've got to be responsible but don't forget the responsibility to yourself to live your dreams while you still can. If that means retiring early then sobeit, if it means tinkering part time into your 100s sobeit, everyones different and what suits me ma not suit you may not suit mr x.... My grandfather retired but went straight back to work as he was bored, this was a few years ago but he then died a few days later so didn't benefit from all the "wealth" he'd built. My father retired early with a brain tumour some 25 years ago and has been ill since, my mother was in good health but developed a soft tissue cancer and was dead in months, this lead my father to depression and existence rather than life and he continues breathing but not building any new experiences so my advice, do what your heart tells you and spend as much time as you can building more experiences with your loved ones.
I think that this has been a first rate discussion. Most of the things that people have talked about I can relate to. Redundancies have come my way, big decisions about what I should do when I retired, should I strike out on my own rather than work for others, should I allow a hospital to carry out an operation on my 95 year old mother. All decisions that require serious thought. Many people said when we told them that we were moving over here, that they thought we were very brave. We never saw it in that light. Something said it was the right thing to do and as things have turned out that was correct. We had lived in the same house for over 35 years and were heavily involved in the local community. Some weeks we hardly spent an evening in as there was this or that meeting to go to. Somehow this had taken over our lives and we felt that we needed a fresh start and most of all a new challenge. To find a house that was a building project with land to mold as we thought best was what we needed. So we sold up in England just before the housing bubble burst and started out on a totally different life style. It could have gone wrong of course, but if it had I think that our attitude would have been, at least we tried. To have something in the back of your mind that seems like an ideal or a goal and to never actually try it seems like a failure of spirit or will. If anyone had told me 20 years ago that I would be living here I would not have believed them, but sometimes to just follow your instinct does work out. We all are faced with things we would rather not have to deal with, but sometimes it seems as if you are being pushed in a direction that does not seem the obvious choice.
My paternal uncle was diagnosed with myelofibrosis just after Christmas 1988 when he was less than a month short of his 37th birthday - this is an illness that turns the bone marrow into a a fibrous type of tissue and is normally found in those over 50. We'd stayed with my Uncle and Aunt for Xmas - they live in Norwich - and we could tell he wasn't too well when we returned home. A couple of days later, we had the call from my Aunt saying that it was thought that he would have about 6 months but because of his age, they'd try him on a new treatment. Two months ago he had his 60th birthday.
Great story Barry - gives hope Funny thing is Frenchie that until Mrs L had her heart attack it was our plan to move to near Limoges and do what you are doing but we got cold feet due to the heart attack and our lack of good enough French - people said we were brave to move to Wales though so what they would have thought about Limoges I dont like to think
So right OFH, a very good discussion - it does make you think on things that sometimes are easier to "put to onside" until another day. As I mentioned, Mrs W_Y parents are getting very frail and the MIL has just come out of hospital after 7 weeks of in & out of 3 different hospitals and they are really worried she may have to go into care and they will be forced to use their savings and even sell their bungalow...these things have to be planned ahead, but as soon as I mention the dreaded downsizing word, Mrs W_Y changes the subject..
Just to follow up on my previous posting about following your instinct sometimes, today my daughter came round needing some help, her lawnmower had died but her grass hadn't. Her husband works in Belgium and only gets home for weekends. They were living just outside Gloucester, but wanted to bring their children up bilingual and really wanted to come and live in France. Their house had been on the market for a long time, yet despite lots of interest people could not commit to buy it for different reasons. They took a plunge and left it on the market, but rented a house about 10 miles from us. A big chance I thought as after six months the bills would start arriving again. Today she had the news that her husband has the possibility of a contract in Limoges, only an hour away, meaning that he could be home everyday. Tomorrow I hope that their house will have a buyer which would be fantastic. Stepping into the unknown sometimes seems to pay off.
Dear God!! No wonder the economy is down the spout!! If the entrepreneurs on The Apprentice tonight were anything to go by we have no hope!! All the market research said that the customers liked the 'tap cozy' idea but they decided to go with the 'splish splash' bath screen which kids can write on but keeps the water in the bath. They ended up loosing badly!!
Thanks for sharing folks...... deeply moving .....and I wish you all well..... Life is so short eh..... and we never know....what tomorrow brings... The head of HR has just emailed me and asked me to ring him tomorrow...... MAYBE.....
scooting past Dan's post coz i'm watching it now and don't want to know what he has to say! lol... On the subject of Carpe Diem...a question. It's a financial question. I am not one for saving loads of money..i don't exactly spend what i earn, and i do have savings, but i don't throw all my available funds into pensions and policies and such...though i have a Mr H who believes in saving for that rainy day. Are you a Mrs or a Mr H, or are you somewhere in the middle (which is probably where we should be lol)
Morning all from Bristol, 2 nights smashed, 2 to go! A very interesting discussion at the moment, it is interesting to see everyones point of view and everyones experiences. On this board we certainly do have a wealth of life experience!
A late believer in the power of positive thinking and even when things go wrong to take the positives out of things,certainly makes life less stressful
Not sure the personal invitation to ring the head of HR.... is so good Anyway.... we will see. have a good day one and all
