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Best football joke

Discussion in 'Southampton' started by lamby, Mar 22, 2012.

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  1. ChilcoSaint

    ChilcoSaint What a disgrace
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    She was only the constable's daughter but she let the Chief Inspector

    She was only the admiral's daughter but her naval base was full of discharged seamen.
     
    #41
    ChilcoSaint, Mar 23, 2012
  2. hotbovril

    hotbovril Well-Known Member

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    :laugh:

    She was only the cricketer's daughter but she liked a good length in her crease.
     
    #42
    hotbovril, Mar 23, 2012
  3. St. Luigi Scrosoppi

    St. Luigi Scrosoppi Well-Known Member

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    She was only a welder's daughter but she had acetylene legs.
     
    #43
    St. Luigi Scrosoppi, Mar 23, 2012
  4. St. Luigi Scrosoppi

    St. Luigi Scrosoppi Well-Known Member

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    Christians only have one wife. This is called monotony.
     
    #44
    St. Luigi Scrosoppi, Mar 23, 2012
  5. fran-MLs little camera

    fran-MLs little camera Well-Known Member

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    Shame on you when you won the lottery of life with the lovely Mrs Godders:emoticon-0115-inlov
     
    #45
    fran-MLs little camera, Mar 23, 2012
  6. ChilcoSaint

    ChilcoSaint What a disgrace
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    She was only the architect's daughter, but she let the Borough Surveyor.
     
    #46
    ChilcoSaint, Mar 23, 2012
  7. St. Luigi Scrosoppi

    St. Luigi Scrosoppi Well-Known Member

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    There is never a dull moment in my life thanks to that very lady.
     
    #47
    St. Luigi Scrosoppi, Mar 23, 2012
  8. DoctorWu

    DoctorWu Member

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    She was only the fishmonger's daughter, but she knew how to lay on a slab and say .... fillet

    She was only the garage owner's daughter, but she loved the smell of benzole ....
     
    #48
    DoctorWu, Mar 23, 2012
  9. breconsaint

    breconsaint Active Member

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    She was only the accountant's daughter, but she really enjoyed double-entry....
     
    #49
    breconsaint, Mar 23, 2012
  10. hotbovril

    hotbovril Well-Known Member

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    She was only the mechanic's daughter but she did love an oily sump.
     
    #50
    hotbovril, Mar 23, 2012

  11. ChilcoSaint

    ChilcoSaint What a disgrace
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    She was only the tobacconist's daughter, but she did love a good rough shag.
     
    #51
    ChilcoSaint, Mar 23, 2012
  12. hotbovril

    hotbovril Well-Known Member

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    She was only the Sergeant Major's daughter but she did enjoy a good drill.
     
    #52
    hotbovril, Mar 23, 2012
  13. devonFRATTONiser

    devonFRATTONiser Well-Known Member
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    She was only a potter's daughter but she had a lovely pair of jugs
     
    #53
    devonFRATTONiser, Mar 23, 2012
  14. hotbovril

    hotbovril Well-Known Member

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    You just got me with a snotty! Pellegrino Limonata all over the shop!
     
    #54
    hotbovril, Mar 23, 2012
  15. AberdeenSaint

    AberdeenSaint Well-Known Member

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    Och Aye the noo, that`s a real sporran-splitter of a gag ! .........but hang on a minute, what was the score the last time mighty England played crap Scotland ?
     
    #55
    AberdeenSaint, Mar 23, 2012
  16. Channon walked on H2O

    Channon walked on H2O Active Member

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    Back at footie jokes, heard this one last night in the pub ..

    Fell asleep in the chair the other night. My missus woke me and told me Torres had scored twice while I was sleeping. "Christ, how long was I out for?"
     
    #56
    Channon walked on H2O, Mar 23, 2012
  17. SAINTDON13

    SAINTDON13 Well-Known Member

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    7. A grenade thrown into a kitchen floor in France would result in Linoleum Blownapart.

    Gets the award for the most topical joke!
     
    #57
    SAINTDON13, Mar 23, 2012
  18. SAINTDON13

    SAINTDON13 Well-Known Member

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    She was the Colonels daughter and knew what Regiment.
     
    #58
    SAINTDON13, Mar 23, 2012
  19. SaintJabie

    SaintJabie Well-Known Member

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    She was but the turkey farmers daughter, but she could have done with stuffing.
     
    #59
    SaintJabie, Mar 23, 2012
  20. devonFRATTONiser

    devonFRATTONiser Well-Known Member
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    Viz (Style) Top Tip:

    England players: protect yourself from Emile Heskey by disguising yourself as a goal.
     
    #60
    devonFRATTONiser, Mar 23, 2012
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