Swansea Sitty vs.Evaton (Sitty?) Venue: Libutty Stadium Date: Saturday 24th March 2012 Time: 3am [Scottswan is moving house at the moment so he's asked me to do this weeks match thred. So here goes ] Welcome one and all to the match thread for the game between Swansea and Evaton. Err......Err......Sorry guys, carnt think of anything else to say I know what - i'm meeting up with the guys at the pub tonite so i'll make notes on wot they know about Evaton and let you know. Laters ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------ Here's wot we torked about (me, Darren, Andy, Tarquin and Molly): The Club I thort they were called Evaton Sitty but Darren said Evaton United and Molly said it was just Evaton. Not resolved. The Manager Well-respected in the football world but some heated discussion over the spelling of his name. I said M-O-I-S-E as in N-O-I-S-E, but Tarquin said it was M-O-Y-Z as in B-O-Y-Z n the Hood. Not resolved. Date Founded We figgered somewhen between Cromwell (c.1660) and 1990 but it didn’t seem important, so we moved on. Nickname We all knew they were called the Toffees. Andy said the Evaton players have more fillings per player than any other Premier League team. Also they have more team dentists than physios. Molly said he was talking bollocks. Ground Goodison. Separated from Anfield by a large park. We weren’t shaw what it was called. Suggestions were: Central Park, Hyde Park, Gosford Park. Not resolved. Their team Tim Howard (GK) - American. Getting on a bit. Layton Banes (DEF) - Tarquin said he was the only Prem player named after a county (Bath And North East Somerset). Andy suggested Clark Kent. Molly said he’s not a footballer. Has a good left foot and an England international, but getting on a bit. Johnny Heitinga (DEF) - Dutch player sent off in the 2010 World Cup Final. Getting on a bit. Sylvia Distin (DEF) - Molly said ‘Distin ain’t big enough for the both of us’. That made us larf. Definately getting on a bit. Phil Jagielka (DEF) - Came from Sheffield United. Had a bruther who also played for Sheffield United. (no-one could remember the brothers name). Getting on a bit. Neville (MID) - Much debate over weather it was Gary or Phil who now played for Evaton. We had a vote and it was 2 votes each with one spoiled ballot paper. Not resolved, but either way, getting on a bit. Tim Cahill (MID) - Chopsy Aussie with lots of tattoos. Agreed he was good in the air considering his size. One to watch out for. Drenthe (MID) - Dutch. Looks like Mr. T Steven Pienaar (MID) - Played for South Africa in the World Cup Finals. Getting on a bit. Straqualursi (STR) - Tarquin said he had a prawn straqualursi at an italian restoront which made him throw up. We said we didn’t want to know. Marajuana Fellaini (STR)- Molly said him heading a ball would be like getting a pea stuck in a brillo pad. Our Predictions Darren - we'll stuff them 3-0. Andy - we’ll stuff them 4-0. Tarquin - we’ll stuff them 5-0. Molly - it could be a tough game if they stop us from playing out from the back like Norwich and Stoke did. They have some experienced players who can cause problems. Our bubble may be about to burst. 1-1. (Not bad for a girl). Ildiwch Mr-G.
Big thumbs up from me Mr G ! So basically their players are getting on a bit and we will win. I'll happily take that, only thing that bothers me is that they are the mother of all bogey teams for us. We've never beaten the buggers ever !! Also, why are they called toffees when Everton mints are mints and not toffees ?
Everton fan here (I know it's rare on here) Can I give you an proper analysis of our usual starting 11? I know the OP's thread will be tough to follow up being so accurate and what not... Usually play 4-2-3-1 Howard - Solid Underrated, Aged 33 so not that old considering Friedal is 40. Hibbert - Squad player, not really good enough but been consistent this year Heitinga - our best player this year, An absolute rock in the defence. Though I wouldn't want to argue with him getting on a bit at the grand age of 28. Distin - Should be past it but he's not. been brilliant this season despite being 34. Baines - Sexy bastard. Fellaini - Probably our best/second best player. Been outstanding this year and can control any midfield. Gibson - Mocked at Utd, not entirely sure what he brings but should be back for Swansea game after injury. So far he has played 7, won 4, drawn 3, lost 0 Drenthe - Erratic, Can pull of a piece of brilliance then 5 minutes later make a stupid mistake. Probably our most dangerous player. Cahill - Too old maybe but he's had a poor year, scoring just twice though he has looked pretty good in his last few games. Pienaar - BAINAAR (Baines and Pienaar) down our left side is one of the best partnerships in the league, they're unplayable at times. Jelavic - Looks the real deal, can't wait to see him get a run of games. Great movement, strong aerial ability and a great finisher. Other notable players... Neville - Captain fantastic, Renowned for his pointing abilities. ****e footballer though. Osman - Can go anonymous in some games but is a very creative player. Straqualursi - Cult hero at the moment, gives 100% (I'd say 110% but that's just a stupid cliche) and is a handful. Anichebe - ****e Rodwell - ****e, Injured all the ****ing time. Coleman - What he lacks in skill he makes up for in pace. Can defend well too. Think we will probably play a weakened team with an eye on the cup. Would take a draw now to be honest. 4 points against a good footballing side for the season would probably be a success. Apparently, back in the day (like the early 1900's) there was a toffee shop in a village where we played which sold Everton mints, and on the other side of the road was an Everton logo on a wall(?) and therefore the Toffees nickname stuck (Hey, I didn't say it was a good reason )
Nice one Mr G, your very accurate with your synopsis. That Molly sounds a decent bird!!!, tell Tarquin to pull his finger out, no help at all.
Our home form should see us through but i would not be complacent as to say we will definately win, Everton are a good side and can turn it on sometimes, their problem is they are not consistent enough, they can beat anyone on their day so we must not think its a formality. They have a great manager who when a team is after a new manager he is always mentioned but i admire him for his loyalty to everton. This will be one of the hardest games of the season at home as everton is a team you cant predict the way they will play, they can be brilliant or they can be awful but they will not lie down for anyone, they also have some tasty players that will make it hard for us but our home form if goes to plan should get us one or three points. i hope the latter but i wont put any money on it....
Is Molly actually a bank account somewhere? Nice one Mr G Thanks Shogun for a better insight (but much less entertaining) version. Think we can win this one but it won't be easy. Moyes (Moyz) is a wily old fox. But I'll go with 2-0 Swans. Graham back on the scoresheet.
Outstanding Article Mr Gulible ! A very informative and accurate match day thread that will im sure impress the Hell out of the Toffees I must say the quality of the last 2 matchday threads have been absolutly top notch, makes me proud to be a member of this message board On to the game. I think this could be a struggle for us, Everton will come down and be extremely hard to breakdown IMO, i cant see Moyes wanting 3 consecative league defeats so i think the game will be a 1- 1 draw. The flip side is that predicting Swans results lately is pretty much impossible to do !! Everton will be a hard game for us though, make no mistake Top thread
Everton away was one of our poorest showings this season and that was mostly down to Everton, unlike Mancini and Martin Jol David Moyes will have done his homework and have his team prepared very well, i like Everton always have done as they were the backbone of our Welsh team for years, i would love a Swans win but i see this as a real arm wrestle
Man City have been the only team to really rip us apart this season, and that was down to Toure (IMO). When they came to ours ..... was he on the park? At Goodison Fellaini, used his size also to brush aside our midfield, but we will get our own back at ours. We will run and pass them ragged, as Mr G says, we will see how much 'getting on & past it' they really are!! We'll get 2 or 3, just to get the better of them over the two legs.
You better go and check your table again, our home record is the second best defence in the league, with just 2 losses.
Don't believe so, Shogun. Thought only the 2 Manc teams did. May be wrong. Moyes was at our last home game I believe.
