Ha actually have done that.. When I was with my ex, made a chilli using fresh chillis, didn't wash my hands after. Went to bed and did the nasty.. After about five mins we both said our bits were on fire... Was meant to marry her last year, our first dance was going to be kings of leon, sex is on fire
ahhh fukc off you win, that was fkn classic, try this I shared a flat with this guy, he was a bit of a knob, this is in the same period as tramp licking, and well me and the afore mentioned chef, we took his bottle of pizaz? aftershave and made it into pissaz aftershave with a few select dribbles Imagine my amusement on friday nights, that one kept giving for a while, especially when his sister showed up often kissing his cheek in greeting, even his mom
I managed to do similar during the 2006 world cup whilst watching England vs Ecuador round a mate's house whose living room was packed to the rafters as it was also his birthday. Ended up on the end of the sofa chatting up a tasty bird. She went for a piss just before the match finished, so at the final whistle I move towards the back of the house to find her again, and drop my almost empty can of Stella into the fireplace. Bend down to pick it up and absolutely nail the crown of my head on the corner of the stone mantelpiece on the way back up. I was fairly well gone by that stage so didn't realise how bad it was. Caught up with the bird only for her to turn around and ask "why is there blood dribbling down your face?" Fortunately the story has a happy ending. I drank my way through it, went home and ****ed my girlfriend
You're disowning him? Does that mean I can OWN him? That's right gents, piss poor Diadora Barnes Stormesque owning banter is back!
You're forgiven!! Not much makes my blood boil more than seeing an adult reading a hard back copy of the latest Harry Potter book, like it makes them look cool. It doesn't, it makes them look like an adult reading a ****ing childrens book. Next time I take train somewhere I think i'll take a copy of Five go to Smugglers Top by Enid Blighton. Cool as ****.
You can't beat always having a copy of famous murderers to read on a tran then occasionally looking up to wink and stare at the women sat near to you..
I was pleased to see the '' why do people think I'm Eric, I've never been offensive to anyone'' Cheecky git.