One dose of Grant Holt's spunk has been cryogenically frozen in case the human race becomes sterile - Doctors say it will be more than enough to sustain the human race until the next ice age!
Superman wears Grant Holt pyjamas And Grolt went to the Virgin Islands - when he came back they were just 'The Islands' OTBC
Welcome to the board Cj - what a brilliant first post! By God, you've given yourself something to live up to!
Grant Holt is MAD.That's a fact! Now you may ask what evidence I have for what appears to be an outrageous claim. But consider this: Yesterday,instead of playing at The Liberty and condemning The Swans to only their second home defeat of the season.Probably watched by half a million or so live around the world and another few million later on MOTD he could instead have been at the second largest settlement in Fife,being watched by 7,464 people.Many of them fortfied by strong liquor and deep fried Mars bars. The away support would have consisted of gentlemen of a certain age wearing string vests and suits with an arm missing,accompanied by the De rigeur fashion item of the Clydeside intelligentsia.the black and white baseball plimsoll.Their Bedford Plaxton would no doubt have passed the Bathgate Sherpa Van works on the way,a place made yet more famous by The Proclaimers in their song Letter from America. "Linwood no more,Bathgate no more". All this could have been his had he not spurned his big chance of signing for Rangers.
Grant Holt can make tears cry. Grant Holt sleeps in the light. Not because he is scared of the dark but because the dark is scared of him.
Grant Holt turned down the chance to play Jason Bourne, James Bond and the Terminator because they cannot do what he can do in real life.
We try to warn fans every week that calling him fat only increases the likelihod he will score against you So far, No luck.
Are you absolutely sure about that one Carra - I heard it was for 5 minutes and he hung upside down like a bat!
