I had to change my fantasy football team - I've replaced Suarez and john Terry with Adolf hitler and Alf garnett.
not made up but a classic Man goes into a pub with a monkey. Puts the monkey on the bar and says to the barman 'if my monkey shows you a trick will you give me a beer on the house' Barman: yes The man punches the monkey in the face, the monkey rolls along the bar, rings the bell, rolls back, jumps down, unzips the mans jeans and gives him a blow job Barman: wow, can I have a go? Man: yes The barman punches the monkey in the face, the monkey rolls along the bar, rings the bell, rolls back, jumps down, unzips the mans jeans and gives him a blow job Toby has been watching this from the table where he was having a quiet pint. The barman shouts over 'Toby come and have a go' Toby walks over and says 'OK but dont punch me too hard'
Replace the words Bar with mosque Barman with Iman and monkey with 12 year old white girl and it's a Dispatches special from Stoke.
i'm pleased wigan didnt get paired with barnet in the fa cup this season cos i would expect things to get incredibly hairy!!!
An Englishman an Irishman and a Scotsman walk into a bar, the barman says "Is this some sort of joke?"
Why does the Catholic Church do its best to protect *****philes? Because the last one they shunned in the 7th century started Islam.
