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Urgent Help Needed..honest..

Discussion in 'Newcastle United' started by I Bleed Black & White, Mar 12, 2011.

?

What do I do with this dog looking at me?

  1. Keep going and ignore the dog...

  2. Get up, walk over to the door and smack it over the head with my piece...

  3. Rub some jam on me bot and get a doggy rim job...

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  1. I Bleed Black & White

    I Bleed Black & White Member

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    Right at this second i'm shagging my next door neighbour (with my phone in my left hand making this post).. the problem is that her dog keeps eying me up while i'm pounding away...

    Help.. what do I do>
     
    #1
    I Bleed Black & White, Mar 12, 2011
  2. jimileysbaldhead

    jimileysbaldhead Well-Known Member

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    If the dog does give you a good seeing to, make sure you charge plenty for the pups
     
    #2
    jimileysbaldhead, Mar 12, 2011
  3. Agent Bruce

    Agent Bruce Well-Known Member

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    Long time no see YungJimi, has her indoors given you permission to use the computer?
     
    #3
    Agent Bruce, Mar 12, 2011
  4. jimileysbaldhead

    jimileysbaldhead Well-Known Member

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    Don't have much time these days as I'm pretty busy.

    Just having a bit of fun before I embark on a full on day at work.
     
    #4
    jimileysbaldhead, Mar 12, 2011
  5. Gutierrez's Right Boot

    Gutierrez's Right Boot Well-Known Member

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    Tell it to go see Roy Keane
     
    #5
    Gutierrez's Right Boot, Mar 12, 2011
  6. Hung Drawn and Quartered

    Hung Drawn and Quartered Well-Known Member

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    #6
    Hung Drawn and Quartered, Mar 12, 2011
  7. I Bleed Black & White

    I Bleed Black & White Member

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    Hahaha, it's boring whenn there's no toon matches going on, I need entertaining
     
    #7
    I Bleed Black & White, Mar 12, 2011
  8. Hugh Briss

    Hugh Briss Well-Known Member

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    Be sure to use raspberry jam - dogs love it...<whistle>
     
    #8
    Hugh Briss, Mar 12, 2011
  9. Tiggyrimana

    Tiggyrimana Active Member

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    deducted rep for lovenkrands comment
     
    #9
    Tiggyrimana, Mar 12, 2011
  10. Mod Face

    Mod Face Well-Known Member

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    If you slap a dog across the face with your cock is it assault or rape in the eyes of the law?
     
    #10
    Mod Face, Mar 12, 2011

  11. AH

    AH Active Member

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    If you rape a prostitute does that count as shop lifting?

    A classic joke..
     
    #11
    AH, Mar 12, 2011
  12. Voluptuous Vuckic

    Voluptuous Vuckic Active Member

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    Who gives a damn about your dilemma (although the jam route does sound interesting <whistle>). You have successfully become the first man to multi-task while having sex <yikes>. We must now bow down to the master.
     
    #12
    Voluptuous Vuckic, Mar 12, 2011
  13. Hatem Is A Geordie

    Hatem Is A Geordie Active Member

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    <laugh> I have watched tv before...
     
    #13
    Hatem Is A Geordie, Mar 12, 2011
  14. Voluptuous Vuckic

    Voluptuous Vuckic Active Member

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    Yes but let's face it, you didn't notice what was happening did you. We all know that when Jeremy Kyle comes on thats it for us men.
     
    #14
    Voluptuous Vuckic, Mar 12, 2011
  15. u408379965

    u408379965 Well-Known Member

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    Do dogs eat jam? I thought they were carnivorous? Stuff a turkey drummer up there just to make sure. <ok>
     
    #15
    u408379965, Mar 12, 2011
  16. Hatem Is A Geordie

    Hatem Is A Geordie Active Member

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    This. <ok>
     
    #16
    Hatem Is A Geordie, Mar 12, 2011
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