As there is no real news going on saints wise I thought I would post this. I got sent this by a mate earlier today, it was quite a good read during a boring day at work. Made me remember a lot of funny school memories. TYPES OF SCHOOL KIDS (Which one were you?) The noob - Pretty special at the best of times, they are the kid who will constantly cause problems during class just to get a bit of attention. Stupid comments and arguments with the teacher are common. They think they are popular because of this but what they do not know is that the whole school think they are complete bell end. The noob's best friend - Copies the "noob" in almost every way. He is a kind of sidekick. The normal kid - Pretty simple, this kid has mates but is neither in the so called "cool gang" or the "geek squad". He/She scores average in her academic subjects but is never going to work for NASA. The space cadet - A total ******. period. The Geek - We all know this one. Funky hair, glasses so big it looks like he/she should be working as a welder, and can calculate any sum you throw at them in there head before you have even finished asking the question. Usually found eating eating there lunch on bench with another geek. Bully's pick on him/her because of their superior ability. However they should be respected as they are more clever than you can ever f*cking dream of! The bully - Say no more, we all know the story. The enforcer - Best friends with the "the bully" also a complete utter prick. The phone addict - This person can never be with out their phone. They are constantly on their phone and the second class has finished yep you guessed it ,they are on the phone without fail. A career in the carphonewarehouse awaits them after graduation. That person you just cant stand -There doesn't seem to be any identifiable reason why you dislike this person, but they seem to possess an aura, a quality about them that you can't stand. Despite your efforts to rationalise your dislike this person, and a brief attempt to even LIKE them, you find yourself repulsed by some unseen force. This person is usually a guy, and for some reason he seems to get all the girls some how. The Stoner - Can be found at the back of the class with a family size packet of pickled onion monster much. The Goth - Black hair, black finger nails, black look a like matrix coat, metallica blasting out of their ipod. Enough said. The school couple - Everybody in the school knows that these 2 are an item. Any argument they have is broadcasted around the school in a matter of minutes. The guy is usually a good sportsmen and the girl more often than not a needy high maintenance barbie doll. They both need a good slap from time to time. The foreign exchange student - The poor kid has been left behind after last years German exchange trip and is now lost in the system. However this can be used to many peoples advantage, as you can blame problems on them due to the fact they cant speak English to the teachers to prove their own innocence. The Fat kid - Always has a mars bar in his fat gob. Generally seen waddling around the vending machine waiting for it to be filled. The kid with the the strange name - You know this one.. first day of class, teacher is calling the register.. he gets to "Z" and looks up with a puzzled expression on his face like its written in Japanese, and some girl red in the face says, "Zaprena", or something to that effect. Followed by the whole class pissing them selves with laughter. This Girl is then bullied for the rest of her school life unless she is lucky enough to be rather attractive. The late bloomer - You have known of this girl your whole school life from when she had chicken poxs to having her braces fitted. So un attractive no guy would look at her... until the last year of school and BAM!!! She suddenly grows a pair of tits and is so fit before you know it shes noshed off half the football team and had a three some in the disabled changing room. Mr or Mrs Nice - To nice for the own good it actually gets annoying. Nothing is to much effort this person. The library crew - Always in the library ,can never be seen out if it. F*ck me they even a VIP card to get in. The horny boyfriend/girlfriend pair - These two sit together, usually with the guy right behind the girl, and the guy proceeds to poke and tickle the girl during the whole class. The boy racer lover - This girl will only go out with older guys who have some suped up Vauxhall Corsa with trainer stand of spolier stuck on the back they stole from sports direct. Often seen driving round the local estate on a Friday or Saturday night. The dealer - Can be found in the toilets furthest away from anyone of any authority. Sells ***s and various other items. The Jock - Gifted sportsmen who is going out with he hottest girl in school. Girlfriend of the jock - Roles reversed, she is usually super hot and pretty down to earth. The Smoking in the bushes gang - No matter what the weather, it could be pissing down with rain, snowing, it could even be a f*cking meteor storm for all they care. Every break time they can be scene marching down to the school field like an army regiment just for their nicotine fix. Left, right, left, right!! The class clown - No matter what the subject, this person can have the class and even the teacher in hysterics. Although they are usually thick as **** and the the IQ of can of soup. The future attorney - Argues every point made in class to the point where everyone starts throwing books at him. The blonde - We have all witnessed this at some point. God help her!! Will from "The Inbetweeners" - Every school has this guy has always struggled for friends and in spite of his endless efforts to make them. Any notice you take of him is something he gladly looks for, and if you show even the slightest recognition of his presence, you will automatically be identified as a friend. Totally annoying but in the end you just give up and accept him out of pity. Jay from "The Inbetweeners" - Universally hated by all girls for his comments about sex. This guy is never going to get a girlfriend until he leaves school. Mr pissed his pants - Wet them selves in year 3 and is therefore mocked for the rest of their school life. Mr ADHD - Dare them to do something and they will do it. To snorting a crushed up polo up their nose to grinding a piece of wood down to make a spear in wood work they will do it. Every teachers worse nightmare. ****ing crazy! The Cockney - Moved down from the big smoke in year 9. Usually falls in to "The dealers " circle of friends very quickly for his knowledge of getting as ****ed as possible of a small amount of weed. The Sheltered Child - This is the one whose parents didn't want them exposed to any bad stuff. They've never gotten drunk, or high, or had sex, and frankly they don't want to. But they are first person to chuck up at end of school prom before being carted off in an ambulance to have their stomach pumped, after necking 3 litres of cider. ... So which one were you?
I don't think I really fell into any of those categories. Me and my mates were into playing guitar and listening to metal. We spent a lot of lunch periods jamming in the music block. Didn't act like twats in lessons and piss teachers off or anything, but we did come up with some pretty strange ways of entertaining ourselves, which would often involve breaking things or hurting each other. Fun times.
Mr Nice At my school (which was only 4 years ago) everyone obviously had their group if friends and I was fairly popular within my group, known for being funny an having a bit of a comical wit Got on well with everyone and never had problems with anyone. Always cheerful and looking at the humorous/bright side of life. Thinking back and comparing to now, I do still try to make a joke of of the simplest of things Also just to say what an excellent thread this is!
I was up for an award called Kiss of the Year....the kiss I was nominated for never ACTUALLY happened I didn't get it anyways!
Mixed for me. The normal guy is one. I think you should make "the man flirt" and I'd be that. Also, I was a real joker bruv init. Always having a laugh and couldn't care what anyone thought. And at the end, add abit of "the prick" :/
The normal kid, The noob, the class clown, the normal kif, the normal kid. In order of each year at secondary school from Year 7 to 11
School obviously hasn't changed that much since I left in 1977 then. I recognised all of them, except the phone addict. One fond memory is the time the bully disappeared for a couple of terms - we all knew he was in borstal, but weren't supposed to say - and his sidekick had a traumatic time of it. Tried to attach himself to the other tough-nuts but still got at least one right old battering in the playground. Not gonna say which one I was, but I'll just say I wasn't as cool as I thought I was.
Ashamed to say that i was a bad boy! Didn't grow up fast and didn't realise the importance of exams and my future.Got expelled from 2 secondary schools and then got sent to a school for bad kids that was only 3 hours a day and apparently impossible to get kicked out of! Unfortunately i did! Not proud of this and wish i could have my time again to right somes wrongs but alas i can't,never mind! The good thing is that i learnt from my mistakes and am now a totally different person
The geek (apart from the maths bit). Was known to correct teachers which for some reason made me unpopular with them Had a few close friends, but was bullied until I got to Grammar School (which saved my life as I had skived off school for a year before the 11 plus to avoid them). Loved Grammar School and Uni because I felt more normal. Now happy in my skin and, although possibly still a bit like Marmite, have more friends.
Makes interesting reading.........A lot of the classifications perhaps are foreign to me for the time I was at school. I guess normal kid perhaps combined with the sportsman (Alas not the bit about the girls) I thought they were horrid creatures until about 14. Also known as scrapper......although only had about 2 scraps. Not particularly a tall chap.....but I sorted the school bullies out.....got 6 of the best for doing it, but had no more trouble throughout the rest of my school years.
Certainly not a geek...Fran......... I did just enough to get the passes I needed and no more.....Even my forces exams....just enough points to get me the promotion or what ever. (My thinking was all those extra marks were wasted as it was not going to help me get further up the ladder and so it proved) That's why I'm so accurate with percentages....as usual it is me against the rest of the world.......
