MUTV programme line-up.

This is what MUTV has in store for its viewers tonight.
21.30.Casualty.Owen Hargreaves tells the story of the last 3 years he has spent on the Manchester United treatment table.
22.00.Film.Grumpy Old Men.Alex Ferguson and Sam Allardyce have a grumble over everything,Liverpool,referees over a large bottle of scotch.Fergie also shares his chewing gum with Sam.
00.00.Last of the summer whine.Fergie moans about referee decisions.
01.00.Film.Dumb and Dumber.Rio Ferdinand tells us how he managed to ''forget'' to take a piss,and Wayne Rooney tells the story about how he once put petrol into a deisel engine.
03.00.Close.

 

Strange I was looking at LFC TV's programme line up.

23.00 Film. Run Fatboy Run. Film about ex-Red Neil Ruddock's battle to control his weight.
01.00 Film. Quiz Show. Luis Alberto Suárez tries his "hand" at cheating on TV quiz shows.
03.00 Road Wars. Roads policing proactive unit moves from Thames to Merseyside in an attempt to arrest Steven "AOABH" Gerrard.

 

You heard of One foot in the grave.Actor Eric Cantona is on one,Its called Two feet in the crowd.
Followed by ''Through the keyhole'' with Martin Edwards.Martin Edwards shows us how he likes to peep through the keyhole of girls locker rooms.
Followed by Dirty money with Mickey Thomas,and his forged notes business.
Followed by a brand new film its a premiere its called Grand theft auto starring Ronnie Wallwork.

 

Evening scallies, how many do you expect to lose by on Sunday 3-0 or 4-0. Looking forward to seeing you all crying during the game. Will you be watching us play at wembley THREE times before the end of May. MUFC champions league 2 Liverpoo 1 Champions league. Mufc 10 premierships , Liverpoo Nil. Whats it like to be Sxxxe with a crappy falling down ground.

 

fixed that for you

 

New exciting line up on Friday night on LFC TV:

20.00 Fawlty Towers. Rafael Benitez stars as the spanish waiter in the classic British sitcom.
20.30 Knight Rider. Revamp of the classic show in which Stan Collymore takes a film crew to his favourite car parks in the dark of the night.
21.30 Film. Traffic. Robbie Fowler explores the illegal drug trade in this Crime thriller directed by Stephen Soderbergh.
23.30 An Idiot Abroad. Ian Rush talks about his life and football career in Italy.

 

This article just highlights the class of wind ups.

Constrcrepe they were witty and actually funny comebacks which I'm sure any Liverpool will appreciate as friendly banter.

But ufos, you are just boring, tasteless and un witty, "evening scallies" (good one)

I'm all for banter but you really try to hard and it only ever culminates in you being the biggest FAIL since the Romans tried to kill Jesus..........

 

Contscrepe.
They were funny.
Compared to a UFOS.
How about these.
7 p.m.The Littlest Hobo.The story of Bebe.
8 p.m.Grumpier old men.Alex Ferguson has another whine to Sam Allardyce about referees,Liverpool, over 10 bottles of scotch and 10 packs of peppermint wrigleys.
9 p.m.Fat and proud.Wayne Rooney on his sea food diet,and how he see's food and eats it.
10 p.m until 4 a.m.Comic Relief.Manchester Uniteds 18 failed attempts in Europe under Alex Ferguson.

 

7pm: Top Gear. Alex Ferguson test-drives the new Fiat with a toilet as a driver's seat for those motorway diarrhea moments.
8pm: Tomorrow's World. Ryan Giggs and Paul Scholes review the latest in stairlifts and walk-in baths.
8.30pm: Love Thy Neighbour. Two families and eight kids - five on one side, three on the other.
9pm: Bad Girls. Wayne Rooney on the best of Manchester nightlife.
10pm: Film 2011. Rio Ferdinand promotes his new movie, "Jar Jar Binks: the Football Years."
11pm: In Concert. Manc favourite Mick Hucknall performs in aid of a Manchester scarf charity. Send your old scarves in to help the needy in America.

 

Very good. But have you seen Saturday's line up on LFC TV?

19.00 Film. The Lord of the Rings: The Fellowship of the Ring: Story of a hobbit trying to destroy the ring of power. Starring Sammy Lee.
21.30 Embarrassing Bodies. Dr. Christian Jessen and company talk to David Burrows and Steve Nicol.
22.00 Fat and Proud. The programme that talks to men and women determined to celebrate and advance their size. This week the hosts talk to Jan Molby.
22.30 My life in books. The programme that asks people to talk about the books that have had an impact on their lives. This week Anne Robinson speaks to Steven Gerrard about Spot the Dog written by Eric Hill.
23.00 Film. The Hunchback of Notre Dame. The classic French love story about a deformed bell ringer. Starring Peter Beardsley.

 

This is what MUTV has in store for its viewers.
14.00.Blind Date.Wayne Rooney visits an old folks home,and which lucky 65 year old will accompany him for a kebab and a can of pepsi and 6 batter burgers.Wayne also tells us about his love of blue rinse.
15.00.Wayne Rooney my life story.The trials and tribulations of this infamous footballer,from elbowing opposition players,having nookie with old dears and visiting the red light district in Manchester and having altercations with corner flags.
16.00.Spitting Image.Rio Ferdinand meets a camel.
17.00.Lets learn to read with Wayne Rooney.In this episode.Wayne learns the alphabet.
18.00.Mission Impossible.Rio Ferdinand trys to remember to take a piss.
19.00.Celebrity makeover.Gary Neville attempts to look half way decent.Rio Ferdinand also forgets to take a piss for the second time.

 

This could go on forever!

Amendment to listings on LFC TV on Saturday 5th March 2011.

17:00 Final Score. Run up of next week's (12/03/11) football scores with Bruce Grobbelaar.

Now to Sunday on LFC TV:

19.00 The Money Programme. A discussion about salaries and contracts with Steve McManaman.
19.30 The Jeremy Kyle Show. Jeremy talks to members of the public taken from the vulnerable British underclass . Tonight featuring Robbie Fowler.
21.30 Golf: Highlights from the Honda Classic Leaderboard in Florida. Craig Bellamy and John Arne Riise provide the highlights.
22.00 Panorama. Documentary looking at violence inside and outside British schools. Featuring Jamie Carragher.
22.30 Film. The Goonies. The American adventure-comedy film featuring Martin Å krtel as Sloth.

 

Anderson's Goals: A documentary in two parts, one for each goal.
Seeing Red: Laurence Llewelyn Bowen talks to Nemanja Vidic.
Meet the Press: Oliver Holt, Sam Wallace and Henry Winter interview an empty chair.
Sons & Daughters: Darren Ferguson presents his own show on nepotism.

 

18:00 Deal or No Deal - The Quatari Royal Family & The Glaziers talk about selling & buying Manchester United

19:00 Benidorm - A documentary on the success Ronaldo has had since moing to spain

20:30 Malcolm in the Middle - Comedy caper. This time Malcolm Glazier finds himself inbetween upset fans and banks wanting their loan money back

21:30 Don't Get Done, Get Dom - Dom Littlewood looks in to the financial regulations regarding setting up off shore accounts shortly after announcing the payment of PIK loans

23:00 FILM: Barfly - Biopic about Alex Ferguson

 

Quick sneak at Monday's forthcoming programs:

1400: Bargain Hunt. Tim Wonnacott talks to some Liverpool legends about past quality signings like Jimmy Carter, David Speedie, Igor BiÅ¡ćan, Sean Dundee etc
22:00 Film: Taxi. Starring Queen Latifah and Peter Crouch.

 

T.J. Hooker: Cop show starring Wayne Rooney.
Pysche: This week Alex Ferguson displays his psychic powers of persuasion over a football association's governing body.
Antiques Roadshow: The crew goes to Carrington for ye olde worlde opportunity. A rare Giggs and a faded Scholes feature.
Family Fortunes: The Glazers go head-to-head with the Hicks family. The winner gets to milk a cash cow, while the loser is sent home with a free hankie set. (Repeat)
Supermarket Sweep: David Gill competes to see how many prawns and players he can squeeze into a trolley on a tiny budget.

 

MUTV programme line-up.
13.00.My fat Gypsey wedding.Starring Roy Keane and Eric Cantona.Roy talks about how he met his wife in a halting site in West Cork.Eric Cantona talks about his mobile home in the south of France.
14.00.
Only Fools and Horses.Starring Wayne Rooney and Ruud Van Nistlerooy.

 

Big event on LFC tv: comic relief! A night of fun and laughter as we look back at Liverpool FC's league campaigns over the last 20 years.

 

I hope that includes the 4-1 win at Old trafford 2 years ago then, never get tired of watching that.