Annoying Commentator Cliches/Phrases

Can i add, after you score an absolute TAP IN they come out with;
Whoever 'And its a goal!!'
Andy Gray 'And what a goal!'

Really Andy? That 2 yard strike into the empty net after i dispossessed the keeper and played one simple pass? I've heard him say i 'hit it so hard I'm surprised it didn't go over the bar' again, from 1 yard out.

 

One more to add:

"That's definitely an accidental handball"

Really? I thought he touched it with his hand on purpose, as players lose conceding penalties, right?!

 

This.

 

Has someone already beaten me to "Alan Smith can crop up anywhere" on FIFA

 

Marseille player tries overhead kick twat i mean commentator says "perhaps he's been watching rooney" ending with a smug chuckle
yeah that's right rooney ****ing invented the overhead kick did he dear me how far can he get his tongue up taggarts arse.....come on please

 

Had to bump this

"The crossbar is STILL shaking"..... 2 seconds after it's been hit.

 

Andy Gray

 

This isn't generic but on channel 5 Europa League the commentator spent 5 minutes talking about how Steven Gerrard prepared for his free kicks and how if he pulls his socks up he will shoot and how if he leaves them he wont, coincidentally the free kick after proved his point wrong

 

"I think he was offside"

Get of the fence and do your job you old ****.

It's like when they say "He'll definitely get another chance" - who the **** are you? Mystic Meg? Whenever they say that I hope and pray the player doesnt.

 

Oh i know its so annoying like as well when they say "he scores 9/10 of those" i always hope they get 10 of the same chance and miss them all or when they say "if that hit the target it would have gone in" its like well yes it would but it didnt so it didnt go in

 

I hate when i'm watching a Europa League or Champions League game between two obscure teams and the commentators says something like "The guy has devastating pace and a rocket of a left foot Dave " "Yeah he does Jim, a real threat to the opposing team"

I just think, how the **** do they know? I bet you've never seen him play you daft twats.

 

So true like they dont even make it sound believeable

 

‘That’s a great cross but no one was there.’

A well-flighted pass into the box that finds no one. A terrible cross, really. Surely it is the crossers duty to actually find and pick out someone with his cross as much as it is the striker’s duty to get into the proper positions?

 

That's written too well for a not606 member. Copies. Pastes into Google....

http://harlowharrier.co.uk/2011/02/top-15-annoying-commentary-cliches/

!!

 

Plagerism :O

 

ARRRRRRGH....
.Please (big gulp) be gentle...

 

when they say..
" he is human"
After Messi/ ronaldo, or someone on form, misses a chance







If a team starts well, hits the post twice, has one cleared off the line and a has a one-on-one saved, but the score remains 0-0....
"--------- could be four nil up"

No, because if they had scored the first chance, then play would have restarted with a centre kick, meaning play would have taken a completely different route, and the second, third and fourth chance wouldn't have come about.

 

I'll let you off this once, don't let it happen again

 

Everything Lawro says

 

"stinging --------'s fingertips"

Sure, it was a hard shot, but I doubt it literally stung the keeper's tips