I was shagging this girl the other day when I noticed this bloke was staring at us through the window. I said "Oi! what you looking at you perv, there's a name for people like you. Can we not get any privacy?" "Yeah you can" he replies "It would help if you weren't shagging in my front garden though".
Me and the wife were arguing about holidays last night. I want to go to Ibiza and she wants to come with me