Spotted this today "By applying the Page and Wootters mechanism to two entangled but noninteracting theoretical quantum states — one a vibrating harmonic oscillator and the other a set of tiny magnets acting as a clock — the physicists found that their system could be perfectly described by the Schrödinger equation, which predicts the behavior of quantum objects." Not a lot of people know that
I went to the doctors today, because I keep saying everything twice. He gave me a repeat prescription...
My wife started crying about her weight while we were eating our lunch today. I said, "Chin up, love." She said, "Aw, thanks babe. I'm glad I have you to support me." I replied, "No, I mean pull your chin up. It's in your soup."
I said to my friend, "I saw a band perform in South East Asia." “Singapore?" I said, "He wasn't great, but I've heard worse."
I've only just set up an exaggeration club, and already have over 100 million members. please log in to view this image
I was watching the Olympics when it was announced that GB was in a 'Nail biting final'... How long has that been classed as a sport then?
My wife got me a bracelet with the first initials of our kids on it. Now as I lay on the side of the road, paramedics treating me, I silently pray for David, Nicole and Rachel.......
I put up a high-voltage electric fence around my property over the weekend. My neighbour is dead against it........
A newly wed couple on their honeymoon night are in the bedroom getting undressed when she says. "Darling, now that we are married, I have a little confession to make, I was a hooker before we met, are you OK with that?" He replies "Of course I am darling, we hadn't met then and to be honest it turns me on, so tell me more " She says "Well, my name used to be Brian and I played for St. Helens".
Saw a man elbow a woman's boob as she was standing behind him in a hotel lobby. The man apologized profusely & said "if your heart is as soft as your breasts, I know you'll forgive me." To which the woman replied "if your penis is as hard as your elbow, I'm in room 207"
Paddy was planning to get Married and asked his Doctor how he could tell if his Bride is a Virgin..??? The Doctor said, “Well, you need Three things from a Do-It-Yourself Shop. A Can of Red Paint, a Can of Blue Paint… and a Shovel. ”Paddy asked, “And what do I do with these, Doc”..??? The Doctor replied, “Before the Wedding Night, you Paint one of your Testicles Red and the other Testicle Blue. Then if she says, "That’s the strangest Pair of Balls I've ever seen", you hit her with the Shovel"..