Yorkshireman #1 in toilet of working men’s club: “What do you think of t’comedian?” Yorkshireman #2: “Well I suppose he’s all reet - if you like laughing”.
I was in a taxi the other day and the driver said 'do you mind if I put some music on?' I said 'Not at all'. He said 'Kiss?' I said: 'Let's listen to the music first and see how we feel'.
Just bought a book called 101 Ways to Get Glue Off Your Hands. It's dreadful, but I can't put it down!
Maybe the principal is the same as when Jericho's walls collapsed and it was destroyed by Joshua and the Israelites.
I read this week that if you ejaculate at least 21 times a month you reduce your risk of prostate cancer by 20%. What was also interesting was they said this included masturbation. I wish I had known this when as a teenager my mother clipped my ear and told me I would go blind when she caught me masturbating. Just think I could have told her it was for the good of my health. What does this say about all those blokes who don't get this particular strain of cancer?
I once knew a girl and persuaded her that I had a friend who was called Wan King. She had to say it about four or five times before the penny dropped.
