In the last three decades of the 20th century, Celtic FC established an unofficial benevolent fund for England's Professional Footballers' Association. No sooner had a stalwart of some patch of England's soccer greensward reached a career milestone than a call would be put through to Glasgow's East End. "Hello, Mr Chairman, we would be honoured if you could bring your wonderful football team down to Lancashire to help us honour Bobby in his testimonial year." The phone conversation ought really to have begun thus: "Hello, old friend, we'd like you to bring coachloads of your supporters down to line the pockets of our lad because his club have exploited him for 10 years and our fans are a stingy lot." I am one of those idiot punters. Thirty years ago, when I should have been studying for a pitiful second round of university resits, I decided to embark on a six-hour coach trip to Ipswich to pay homage to some bloke called Allan Hunter. I knew vaguely who he was. He had a big German porn star moustache and played honestly and vigorously for Northern Ireland. He was also an unsung hero of the East Anglian outfit's splendid 1981 Uefa Cup-winning team and, thanks to the economic incontinence of us 15,000 Scots, he has probably since retired to run some thatched tavern in the Cotswolds. I think Celtic won the match, but I couldn't be sure as I was howling with the bevvy for the entire trip. There was licentiousness and turpitude. It was one of those win-win-win-win situations. Big Allan got a bumper pay-off for his decade of honest toil; the Celtic directors banked a sizable appearance fee; we all got a couple of days drinking cider and making the acquaintance of rosy-cheeked women who all sounded like the daughters of the Combine Harvesters, and the fans of Ipswich Town were spared the embarrassment of being exposed as ungrateful niggards. At the end of the game, it was the Scots who remained behind to demand a bow by Hunter. We knew we were playing the role of dumb patsies but at least we would ensure we would be kind dumb patsies. Bobby Moore, Bobby Charlton, Jackie Charlton – all of them invited Celtic to play at their benefit matches. Soon, every long-serving player in the old English First Division was forming an orderly queue to book Celtic or Rangers for the purpose of boosting their endowment funds. The phenomenon continues to this day and we all still follow them down, deluding ourselves that we are regarded as the St Francis of Assisi or Mother Teresa supporters' club on tour. At one point, I thought Manchester United might consider erecting a statue to the memory of the Unknown Celtic Supporter outside Old Trafford; we must have saved the Mancunian miserables a fortune in pension top-ups over the years. Yet Celtic and Rangers are mere shadows of what they once were. They are withering on the vine and it is probably unrealistic to expect any succour from within the sub-prime madness of the English Premier League. Later this month, Rangers will encounter their day of destiny with the Revenue when they will learn whether they are liable for a £49m tax bill arising from a number of colourful tax-avoidance schemes stretching back more than a decade. If the case goes against them, the Govan club faces ruin. Celtic, meanwhile, are reaping a bitter harvest from their policy of recruiting overseas cast-offs who, in return for becoming millionaires at our expense, look like they are trying to arrange flowers when they attempt to defend. If anything were to happen to Rangers, then Celtic will suffer too. For what would be the point of buying a season ticket in the knowledge that your oldest and most bitter foes are out of the picture? The last time any team outside of the Old Firm won the league was 26 years ago and if you have seen the basket cases that Aberdeen, Hearts and Hibs have recently become you will know that it won't happen again in our lifetimes. The SPL's smaller clubs don't help themselves either by regularly giving coaching jobs to Scots for whom English isn't even their third language and by allowing their pitches to resemble, at the end of the season, a practice range for Challenger tanks. The fans of these clubs have simply stopped turning up and why should they? For even if one half of the Old Firm is off the boil, as Celtic currently are, they are routinely hammered by the other half. Celtic and Rangers must leave and Scottish football needs them to leave too. For several years now, the Old Firm have solicited support from Premier League owners to be allowed entry to their feast. On each occasion, they have been rebuffed by chairmen scared that the Glasgow duo's gargantuan pulling power would reduce their share of the Sky billions. Even if that were to change, current Uefa regulations would still need to be altered. Yet the Premier League would be enhanced by the presence of Celtic and Rangers. The product has become predictable and tired and there is little genuine competition. Only three clubs have a realistic chance of winning the title. Of those, Chelsea and Manchester City are common-or-garden outfits who have simply bought permanent residence in the top four. Thirteen clubs have no chance of getting there. The Premier League is no longer a competition – it's an exalted soup kitchen. Sky also saw the product devalued when the broadcaster lost 1-0 to a Portsmouth landlady over their exorbitant pub viewing fees. Like every other football fan in England, they must know that Bolton v Celtic on a wet Monday night is far more tempting than Bolton v Wigan; or Stoke; or Norwich, or any other of those dreary little outfits from England's shires and mill towns. Now all that is required is for a small club called Sion to destroy Uefa's absolute authority in a Swiss court later this month and the secret, guilty desire of every genuine fan in England may yet become a reality: Celtic at home in the FA Cup at the end of January. http://www.guardian.co.uk/commentisfree/2011/nov/06/celtic-rangers-play-in-england?newsfeed=true
Serves you glory hunters right. You reap what you sow. Come back IF your ****ty club win a European trophy in your lifetime. Otherwise **** off and try and avoid administration.
Scottish football is ****ed unless there is a radical overhaul. Too many teams, too few fans and too little money. The fact that Hibs and Hearts wont even share a stadium is testement to the sheer bloody small-mindedness of your average football supporter. They complain they can't compete with the Old Firm yet do nothing to rectify the situation. Ditto Dundee and Dundee utd and a dozen or so other small clubs who play within a few miles of each other.
Bit rich coming from a Celtic fan considering you cannot even compete with a destitute Rangers. What a tucking walloper. And the fact that you almost went out of business in the 90's. Do you remember that or were Celtic not your team at the time glory hunter?
I thought we had called a truce in all this name calling? I think the fact we finished one point behind them in the league last season shows we can compete with them. The fact we're still in four competitions would suggest so too. And I never tuck, I let it all hang free
We had indeed. But you deserved that for your astonishing arrogance and ignorance of the subject. No offence meant though ST. Suppose we can't always agree. Cheerie bye.
Why has the OP: 1: Just cut and paste the whole article followed by the link? 2: Posted this ****e on GC and not the Old Firm/ Irish Football boards? Many thanks
Celtic supporting hack says "the secret, guilty desire of every genuine fan in England may yet become a reality: Celtic at home in the FA Cup at the end of January". Yet the comments, and this is from Guardian readers, the most lefty PC section of English society: "Who wants or needs those two Glasgow clubs, with all the sectarian nastiness they would bring ? On one of their last visits to Manchester, Rangers fans trashed the place. Who wants that 4 times a year…?" "I highly doubt people in England want Old Firm supporters travelling south of the border every week and singing songs about the I.R.A and disrupting a minutes silence." "No thanks pal, you can keep your sectarian rubbish to yourself" "We neither need you or want you." "I'm Scottish and support Rangers but I can't think of any reason why English people would want the Old Firm playing in the EPL." etc.
My concerns are with Scottish football. I'm not in favour of seeing Celtic and Rangers playing in England. I would rather see other teams emerge in Scotland who can challenge the Old Firm. If that has to be an Edinburgh United or a single Dundee club then so be it.
I can think of two clubs in Manchester who certainly would not welcome Rangers. And as you say England can do without the sectarian baggage in their game. It offends us up here.
Mostly ignorant ****e, even from lefty Guardian readers (who are as guilty of anti-Scottish bigotry as readers of the London based Sun and Daily Mail). We had no rioting in our major cities earlier this year. Neither have our clubs ever had long term bans from playing in Europe due to the thuggish behaviour of their fans. That's not to say we don't have our problems but they are geatly exaggerated and no worse than the problems you associate with any big English club.
Perhaps we should have merged Rangers and Celtic in the early 80's. Lets face it the piss poor crowds especially at Rangers would have merited it. Celtic wasn't much better. May also have got rid of the inherent sectarianism.
Scotish football may aswell not exist, the country isn't financially strong enough, to compete with clubs from other parts of Europe. Scottish footballs only hope would be to do what Cardiff, Swansea and Wrexham have done, and join the English league. If they don't do this, they will be left to rot, whilst the rest of Europe pushes on and increases the gulf in class. I understand why alot of Scots are against this, though you all know deep down that if the old firm want to be considered big European clubs again, then it's the only way. I personally don't mind either way, though I do think that with the size of there stadiums, and the support they get, that Celtic and Rangers would sooner or later have strong sides in English football, with the finances the PL provides
Dry your eyes pet, it's about football in general and the topic of the Old Firm going south of the border. If it doesn't interest you don't comment.
Be fair ER, it's not just Rangers, Celtic fans went on the rampage albeit on a smaller scale during and after a "friendly" with Lincoln. Probably thought it was Linfield.
More ignorance. Rangers were banned from defending the ECWC in season 72/73. Please try to be factual.
The "journalist" claimed that English people want Celtic playing in English competitions, I merely pointed out that the comments suggest the opposite.
That game in Ipswich I was there Celtic won 3-2 a Tuesday night , the match was stopped for 20 mins in the second half , the Celtic supporters peed on the generator working the floodlights and they failed causing the stoppage. No doubt Easter road will think I am glory hunter !!!
