Boooom! Buenos Noches, Damas y Caballeros! DH's AwayDays is back for Season 5 Episode 3. This week DH goes to see our cockney caravan loving neighbours over at Knees up Mother Brown for a little catch up. PRE-MATCH: Up at 7am, have a big breakfast, watch us beat Spurs, then a nice long jog before work. Hope you had a liquid brekky, mate. This is a game where I actually enjoy it even more if we are absolutely **** but win. And what about if you're absolutely **** and lose? Thank you very much for the three points, Tottenham. No, no, no, thank you, West Ham. Hope they still have Forster in goal. We could've given him the day off to be fair. Strangely optimistic for this one. Foolish. Just don't lose, is all I ask. Ask and you shall not receive. I guess Moyes old buddy Danjuma will be well up for this game. He probably was. Wish we got to see... Son and Kane always rip our backline to shreds. I fully expect similar on Sunday, even if Son is off form. Kane isn't though. Nicely predicted. It's my birthday tomorrow and I'm away with the family to celebrate. Please don't ruin my birthday West Ham. It honestly brings me so much joy knowing we've ruined your birthday. Kane is one of the best strikers in the world, just stopping him completely is nearly impossible. Didn't think smart West Ham fans existed. I think most us want to beat them so badly because we all know Spurs fans... And they're all a bunch of unbearable c**** at the best of times. You're lucky you don't know me personally, because I'm the most unbearable one of them all. FIRST HALF: All West Ham so far Posted two minutes into the match Rice is bad at corners You should see Kane on freekicks. We've got away with one there Yes, you have, blatant pen. Just got in. We lost yet? Not yet but stay tuned. How are they so high in the League? Harry Kane. SECOND HALF: *1-0* Exactly what we deserved I’m afraid. Yes, yes it was. Undone by Davies and Royal. How pathetic. Carlos and Cafu reincarnates. Why did we have 3 men on Davies and no one picking up Royal? It's natural for opposition to triple up on Benaldinho. Their right wing back is in the box to score. To be fair we were probably as surprised as you. Forster showing Fab how to get down Fab and the rest of you will be going down in a few months though. We're defending a 1-0 loss here. That's relatively impressive for you lot. I ****ing hate Harry Kane Bloody love you, Harry. A top quality striker coming on!! Unfortunately it's for the team already winning. Beware of the benched Son. Son's on so we're as good as 2 down... Give it a second *2-0* God I despise Son. Nice one, Sonny. As I predicted. Our defence isn't good enough. Just your defence? Rice is absolutely hiding in this game by the way Doesn't wanna get an injury before his summer move. Mildly embarrassing so far. This game, this season or your club's entire existence? Worst spuds side for years and still pissing all over us. Standard. POST MATCH: Did we have a shot on target? I think so but rumours are Forster was challenging the fans to rock, paper, scissors for most of the game. Spurs won’t get an easier game all season. Can we play you every week? Sounds like we lacked a bit of quality today. You've generally lacked quality for decades, and the good bits you've had we've signed from you. What do they do in training? Steal caravans and fight one another. *RE Rice* He got bossed by Skipp. Yes, yes he did. And Conte's not even in the Country! It's all good, the dynamic duo were...
Their right wing back is in the box to score. To be fair we were probably as surprised as you. That brought on a double blast of tea down my nose, brilliant
Looking at the league table make me wonder how the hell we are 4th , we have been so ordinary most of the time and last week woeful against Leicester Our next 6 league games I'd hope we can go unbeaten and like last season have a decent run in
The excellent August where it looked like the team were resuming where they ended the season before (how wrong we were) .
Ex-ref Philip Walton reckons that it was a penalty and that at the very least, VAR should have directed the cnut Oliver to view it on the monitor. Probably wouldn't have changed his mind, but interesting that a ref thought the matter unclear enough for a 2nd opinion. Makes you wonder why that option wasn't taken... ? (Yes, we all know the answer to that one!)
https://www.skysports.com/watch/vid...as-a-clear-handball-spurs-miss-out-on-penalty Michael Oliver not only doesn't give it, he intentionally ****s any chance of us getting it.
Oliver is one of those conceited ****s who either thinks he's always right, or is intent on a particular course of action. Based on some of his other decisions it is difficult to work out which option applied in this case!
Richarlison done nothing in them? Though I suppose you could include almost every game in that question
Speaking of Richarlison, Rob Guest did actually post this earlier: The replies are somewhat as expected: You have those similar to myself that simply don’t rate him and called his performance for what it was - average to poor, as he has pretty much been all season when played. Some that say he should play more over Son on current form - a fair shout but then I'd probably prefer to see Danjuma play. Some have suggested similar to CK in that we should play a front four with him in front of Kane in a 4231 - something I personally maintain just wouldn’t work, nor will happen anyway with Conte in charge. In the article itself, Guest says Richarlison needs a run in the side to prove his worth but I don't really see where that run comes from (as I didn't when we first signed him) unless we keep Son on the bench for a while. I did initially think he was signed for versatility as I thought he could play across the front three and therefore be an upgrade on Lucas and Bergwijn from the bench but that isn't the case. So he basically needs for Kane to be dropped or injured to ever get a run in his preferred position. Summer could be quite interesting, Richarlison won't want to be a squad player and if (big if in fairness) Kane renews his deal then Richarlison's situation in the squad won't change. He'll still have a decent market value with the World Cup in memory - do we stick or twist?