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Jury Duty

Discussion in 'General Chat' started by lone ranger, Mar 8, 2010.

  1. lone ranger

    lone ranger Active Member

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    thats a fair point magic. might just flip a coin on day 1 before i go in <ok>
     
    #21
  2. Thomas The Cat

    Thomas The Cat Well-Known Member

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    I've decided to go with the if he looks guilty form of justace, if he has a full head of hair he's guilty, anything other than a white shirt and nornal tie with a normal knot in it he's guilty, leather jacket guilty, earing guilty and no facial hair he's guilty.
     
    #22
  3. Bhoy From Brum

    Bhoy From Brum Well-Known Member

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    Thomas - take a 'Body Language For Beginners' book in with you & pretend to flick between pages everytime he answers a question & scoff quite loudly <ok>
     
    #23
  4. lone ranger

    lone ranger Active Member

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    if he doesnt make an effort and wear a suit etc i dont care how solid the defense is. do not pass go. do not collect £200.
     
    #24
  5. lone ranger

    lone ranger Active Member

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    boss doesnt seem too chuffed about it <laugh>
     
    #25
  6. rogueleader

    rogueleader suave gringo

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    if you want to get out of it just sit at the selection part murmuring " the chair, the chair , the chair...give em the chair "
     
    #26
  7. Magic Laudrup 11

    Magic Laudrup 11 Well-Known Member
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    To get out of it I would do the following

    Turn up wearing suit trousers that are 4-5 inches short
    Make sure your suit jacket is muddy and ripped
    Do my tie in a normal knot
    Don't wear socks and make a point of making sure everyone sees this
    Tell them you were up for the same charge

    <ok>
     
    #27
  8. Bhoy From Brum

    Bhoy From Brum Well-Known Member

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    There's a million ways to get out of it.

    Ask if the defendant is a coon or paki.

    Ask if Sharia Law was actual law in the uk now.

    Ask if you can play your DS whilst listening to the trial, explain who you do this when watching Inspector Morse, Midsomer Murders etc & you still follow the plot & guess the guilty party.

    Ask alot of questions about previous trials held at the court "Is this where Tobin was? THE Tobin?"

    Ask if its a real trial or one of those judge Judy tv shows
     
    #28
  9. lone ranger

    lone ranger Active Member

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    what i'll actually ask is "how much can we claim on expenses?" and "are there any hot jurors?"
     
    #29
  10. Bhoy From Brum

    Bhoy From Brum Well-Known Member

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    "I think we should sit boy, grl, boy, girl, boy, girl, boy, girl, boy, girl" say this whilst staring non stop, without blinking at the hottest juror <ok>
     
    #30

  11. lone ranger

    lone ranger Active Member

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    <laugh>

    i think within 15 minutes of getting my citation through the post i'd created my hot juror **** fantasy <laugh>
     
    #31
  12. rogueleader

    rogueleader suave gringo

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    You could volunteer to be the guy who speaks for everyone - the foreskin of the jury
     
    #32

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