Chilcs is responsible for starting all these puns but then again what do you expect from someone who lives in Drummerset?
https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-england-cornwall-62400251 The local mayor has said he won't close the beaches.
…after a snorkeller was bitten 15 miles off the nearest beach, after the crew had thrown chum into the water to attract sharks to the boat. Jaws this ain’t.
If I won millions on the lottery I would buy a racehorse and call it My Face so on ladies day I would hear all the ladies shout Come on my face
Useless fact: There is a 'Horseracing Name' board, probably with a more official-sounding title, that checks all names of horses that are registered as 'thoroughbreds' so may well appear in horse races, at accredited venues. The idea is that they can spot, and weed out, any offensive names, or ones that are blantantly advertising, before they appear in lists of runners. One name that did get past them was 'Hesfnmntl'. It may look nonsense, but just say it to yourself, and you may realise that it would be a good nickname for some of our past hard men.
Didn’t Johnson name the mayor in that film clip as a person he admired, for putting money before people’s lives?
I remember thinking as I was sellotaping a piranha to a boomerang, this could come back to bite me. I've just hired an odd job man. He was useless, I gave him a list with 8 jobs on it but he only did 1, 3, 5 and 7.
David Beckham is working away so he goes into Interflora to get a bouquet of flowers for Victoria. "Do you want them scented?" asks the assistant. "Yes please," says David. "It's too far to take them myself."
