Well I am quarter-chinese, and I was tubby from about 14 to 18 (lost four stone when I took up jogging, then cross-country running), and I did have a receding hairline (that thankfully stopped at 19 and left me with a Tom Hanks' head, which is more than most of my former schoolmates have now, forty years later). Like Lineker, I was olive-skinned and tanned easily (still do), but I have to say that I didn't get one-millionth of the abuse that the few black and Asian schoolkids I went to school with then in the 70's (the Inny) got. And there were two full Chinese (by race) lads who were also in my class who used to say the same. Dunno why, but racism against the Chinese (who have the oldest non-European community in Britain, dating back to the 18th century, so I'm told - earlier than the great Irish influx of the 19th century) was not as prevalent as the anti-Chinese and anti-Irish racism of the turn of the 19th century, I expect. But that is not to say it's acceptable at all. I do remember though going along to watch one of my mates playing for Yew Tree school (my local secondary) against Paddington @ 1976. I distinctly remember parents there making monkey noises against some of paddinton's black kids, even though there was a black kid playing for Yew Tree (quite a good player too, iirc).
Small children say what they see with no ill intent - "why is that lady fat? .... look at that funny man" etc etc. Parents will answer the questions age appropriately and give guidance on what is good and bad behaviour in public and generally. Don't point, don't stare, don't shout out etc are all part of raising a child well. The most problems occur when the parents themselves holds certain prejudices. Then you have to hope for good teachers and lots of class mates who can show them a different path. My philosophy has always been if you want to change the world, start with yourself. Do the right things, pass on the right messages , help your neighbours, be a force for good and leave people feeling better after an encounter with you rather than worse. The one bit of advice that rings out in my head from being a very small child is treat others how you would like to be treated.
I think its the us and them dynamic that goes back into being a herd of apes in the forest or whatever collective term there is. Our tribe. not our tribe. After a while not our tribe is here long enough its now "our tribe" and the next lot in get it in the neck. See our home secretary. After all are we not all hating on mancs and them hating on us and throwing mindless barbs at the "other" IMO this all boils down to that survival instinct thats no more civilised than a pack of dogs.
Children use accurate descriptions; difference is, people don't get offended because it's an innocent child. Maybe stopping these "innocent deceptions" is the wing way of going about it, maybe people should be proud of those "innocent descriptions" rather than taking offence? Obviously, not always that simple because people (otherwise known as ****s) do use them in an attempt to insult, hurt or upset people.
As long as you're doing your bit and I know you are, your lads will live those values too and they will pass it on. That's all you can do. Don't worry about what others are doing. You can call out bad behaviour when you see it, don't look the other way but ultimately you can only control yourself, don't worry about anyone else. (Not preaching to you personally btw I know you know all this).
You have to be sensible with kids. I do believe Dr King's premise that racism is not innate, and that it is consciously and unconsciously nurtured in children. An example: I live in York, and, compared to Liverpool, Manchester and Leeds, there are few black and Asian families here (or were 20+ years ago). We sent my daughter to a posh prep school locally, that actually worked out insanely cheaper than childminders, especially with the nursery vouchers that both I and the ex qualified for from our employers. That said, most of the kids there came from wealthy families such as doctors, lawyers, farmers (!), accountants and suchlike. Anyway, picked up my then four-year-old from prep school, took her to Tesco's on the way home and she got one of her favourite comics. Soon as we got home she was straight onto my lap and was insistent on reading it with me. The main character in this particular story was a little black girl. 'Ah, she looks Betty in my class'. (Betty was the daughter of a black barrister). Dunno why, but I felt uncomfortable and awkward. 'Er yes, she sort of has hair like Betty, doesn't she?' 'Her skin is black like Betty's as well, isn't it dad?' 'Er, um, well, er, hasn't she got funny shoes!?' 'Dad, is there something wrong with Betty's skin? She is my best friend in school'. 'Oh, oh, no... I didn't mean that..'. How to **** up parenting in one easy lesson... Thing is, kids are not stupid, they can see differences, and they're curious. It's adults, consciously or unconsciously, that pass on ludicrous ignorance, even unintentionally, in my case. All that said, I do think my daughter's generation (26 now) is a lot less hung up on this than mine has been. Woke and proud of it, or at least my daughter is. And I'm chuffed about that.
marvellous ain't they. they can be cruel psychopaths as well. ESP with people with a disfigurement. My kids are so woke i can't even be a gingerist any more.
Indeed. She once yelled all the way across Aldi's 'WHY HAS THAT LADY ONLY GOT ONE HAND, DAD?' when she was three. Muttered apologies and embarrassed shuffling ensued.
Nice little anecdote. Maybe your daughter isn't woke though, maybe she just accepts that we're all different and all equally valuable - as it should be. Woke to me means complaining that a particular organisation is too white or someone shouldn't get help from a foodbank because they don't believe in same sex marriage or whatever. That's the very opposite of the 'we're all equal' message. It's saying that you're only worthy if you agree with me. I'm sure your daughter has a strong sense of what's right and wrong because from what I've seen from you over the years, you are very socially aware and believe in equality and fairness.
I think that's the Daily Mail/Gammon definition of woke, but it isn't mine nor my daughter's. My definition of woke is standing up against discrimination. ignorance and injustice. I don't have tattoos, but I'm thinking of getting a 'Proud To Be Woke' one. Though cowards flinch and traitors sneer, we'll keep the Woke flag flying here, indeed.
Racism is not necessarily innate, but I do think tribalism and "us vs them" mentality is. And in the future it might not be racism but other isms that are predominant. Many kids point out and single out those who are different and I think it will always be the job of society to fix that. I had a friend who was teased mercilessly because he took a briefcase instead of backpack to school. (and this was before the in-betweeners "briefcase ****er). Dorky kids get teased. Kids with glasses get teased. Tall kids, short kids. The girl in my school whose breasts grew first got teased. It's what kids do. They tease based on differences. Racism is bad because it carries on into adulthood for some but I think that racism persists because of a social construct. One thing I'm sure of, as long as humans are in control of ourselves we will always battle some forms of prejudice. Kids show the real "human tendencies" that society hasn't fixed yet. I think things like sports "Liverpool vs Man Utd" for example can be a healthy way to channel our tribalistic instincts, but even that can be abused.
mostly they are just a friend cos they really don't carry on like theres issues. Is when they get to 7 and 8 and teacher and parent are having the impact. I define woke in my head as people who in the past didn't see "issues" and have woken up to their impact on others. the definition on the internet seems to be " aware of and actively attentive to important facts and issues (especially issues of racial and social justice)" its a general insult i guess used by the WASPs etc to insult people just like i call anyone tory or a brexiteer a gammon and then gets conflated with all sorts. Woke: In the past (and recent past) the that was then and this is now. everything is fine, stop talking about this kind of attitude was prevailing. the "we don't see colour" stuff. Now thats being asleep. "Oh we solved that, shut up about all the issues you come up with" In america it seems to be the case that with all the various issues people face on a daily basis due to colour of skin etc are not very popular with the people who don't have those issues on a dialy basis and don't want to lose their privilege. Other issues: Woke is an insult to use about women wanting abortions, or contraception or people wanting health care, or whatever you want to raise. I'd love to be able to solve the worlds problems but can't, but the least i can do is listen and be aware as it costs nothing.
Ironically, the word "woke" is a cultural appropriation and there are a number of black people in America that are angry that white people are using it to discuss more generalized issues. Not all black people are offended by it's use but a decent chunk are. The word "woke" is not very woke.
this is our mate orban in Hungary recently got in trouble for. He has got as far as "mixing" with Europeans is just about alright but this mixing with others wasn't for him and he said so. its classic us v them nonsense. Self justification of membership of EU which he doesn't actually like being but has to for the money.
have to say it never bothered me with kids though did find adults coming up and wanting to know my medical details a bit ****ing forward when they hadn't even asked me what my name was .
I only became aware of the latest usage of the word woke.quite recently. To me, being an African American literature scholar, the word woke was very common amongst black Americans of bygone.days meaning ' I was asleep (to a situation) and now I've woked up'. It was a kind of 'I've seen the light' message which has now been brought into modern usage. So I don't really know if there are two ways of interpreting the current usage of the word woke, one being the let's treat everyone equally way and the other being the permanent victim way that some quarters like to portray. I genuinely don't know. I've seen the mantra Go Woke, Go Broke and took it to mean that some companies such as Disney (who have removed the terms ladies, gentlemen, boys and girls from their parks) are trying to push an agenda (for want of a better phrase) and people aren't buying it - hence the go broke. This might all be nonsense.that I've read. I don't know enough about the new usage of woke to determine if it too is being politicised. I'm not a fan of forcing any beliefs on anyone.
I am in general in support of "all things woke" I think people should be able to live their lives however they want free of persecution as long as you don't harm another. My only problem is with issues that push beyond just living their own life. Transwomen who compete in women's sports obviously have an unfair advantage. Use bathrooms, sure, give them a flower on women's day, sure. Call them she and her, sure, and a discount ladies night at the bar... But the sports thing is an obvious overstep. Forcing everyone to display pronouns. I'm in full acceptance of calling trans people by their preferred pronouns, but forcing everyone to list or display pronouns to me is similar in spirit (although not as extreme) as would be forcing all restaurants to close during Ramadan out of respect for our Muslim neighbours. Sure, let's respect the minority, but don't force it on the majority. I despise the prefix "cis" similarly, mostly because I usually see it used as a slur. When people use the unnecessary prefix "cis" it's almost always followed by negative sentiment about non-trans people. Calling a man cismale to me seems comparable to calling a transwomen a shemale. It's not really done without negative sentiment and a dose of prejudice attached. I'm not of the opinion that two wrongs here make a right. I want to respect and protect minority groups without having to attack the majority.
Modern society is all starting to look a bit "1984". Control the language and the history and you will have full control over the people. Getting rid of Oldspeak and replacing it with Newspeak. Tear down all the statues, rename the.roads and start again
I don't despise the prefix cis mainly because i have never heard of it . Just have no social media and all this stuff disappears - well at least it does where i live .
