Having a McDonalds eh ? I was busy at the 'Church of the Seven Hail Marys', helping a fallen woman find the lavatory....
l can’t believe the parishioners are hearing such vulgar talk. Repent thee sinner..... and donate $500 to the Reverend Squat Appeal. Phone 1800SQUATRETIRENOW
I reckon the flock have heard far worse than that Reverend, remember your sermon a few months back where you were discussing the vestal virgins with the verger, and he requested you save one for him for the weekend ?
Disgraceful stuff parishioner Woops ........ l do however, seem to remember it, please tell me more! Was there a pearl necklace involved? I sure it was about some jewellery?
Reverend Didley pray tell how is the leapfrog competition going with the choir boys, can you please explain why it takes 2 mins followed by the usual paraphrase (that's the best the best 2 mins he's ever had) also when is the sisters hide the sausage competition i hope i get an invite, awaiting your early reply
Yes, I think her name was Pearl, she wasn't a virgin, but the verger was until he went into the toilet cubicle with her, and came out smiling.....
Makem, You seen well versed in the goings on in the chapel, however, the Reverend can assure his followers that all is above board at the Church of Squat. Mrs Roundtree ( with the large bust and short skirt), will be assisting the Reverend in maturing the chapel wine from the still this weekend. The homemade sausages will be at the Sunday church fete. Mrs Roundtree gave the Reverend her approval of his sausage only yesterday.
twas only a year ago i partook in the bare footed treading of the grape festival, i hope my indulgence produced a flavoursome bouquet,The after party is remembered with joy at the frivelarities that were partaken by male and female, And as god works in mysterious ways, it was a pleasure to behold the 7 virgin births, he so graciously empowered the Nuns with, in fact i hear sister Mary is again hoping for a repeat performance.
The Lord .......... hic, works in mysterious ways! Sounds like the wine must of been a good vintage. I'm big on vintage, hic ....... never underestimate a good drop! please log in to view this image
there's a tavern in the town ...........in the town where loads of ale is swallowed down................swallowed down where serving wenches let them swing ..................let them swing they will even take it up the sing .............................sing along now
Makem, Congratulations, you are now the new church choir Arranger type thingy. We need to spice up the church service so we can add another plate collection during the service.
Tell Roger he needs to be at the church by 9.15 am, as old Mrs Wetherby will be waiting for him with her mouth organ at the ready...
Are you saying he’s putting his organ in her mouth..... or are you saying she’s got a mouthful .... I’m totally confused! l’d better open the Confessional box ASAP! Repent thee sinners! You can donate as well!!!!!
I see you have sacked old Mrs Wetherby !! She had it coming to her though, thrusting her mouth organ up the verger's hooter of all things.....
oh yea of little faith never cast aspersions on the good name of Mrs Wetherby,especially as she was only practising blowing in case the organ bellows developed a fault, even the Archdeacon realises it was all done in the best possible taste, mind you she did hint that it tasted somewhat salty