It’s the day before the day we want, match day. The dog is packed and ready, he always goes to visit his mum for a few days because I cant get him into football and he refuses to stay in alone all day, selfish little bugger, I thin k he just enjoys being spoilt on his sleep over’s! Today will be a day of washing, bed changing and housework for me, those bloody black hairs of his get everywhere, I always like a clean fresh bed the night before a game, have you got the point of this article yet? You got it, it’s our pre match tradition, or should that be routine, some would say superstitions. Now don’t get me started but how am I supposed to follow a routine when they keep messing about with kick off time, answer me that? I always on a Saturday leave the house at 11.15 to get to the ground and park up ready for my lunch at the same culinary delight of a burger bar, how do I have lunch at 3.30? Every usual plan is put back, now that cant be right, footy is about tradition, routine, superstition and the powers that be are spoiling it, that’s why we don’t win you know, it knocks our players of balance, it’s a plot I tell you. Answer me this, where is the FA and Premier league based, yes, London is it? Who do we play the morra, Spurs, and where do they live, yes, London is it? It’s a known fact that theses southern chaves like a Saturday night on the town so they will be ready for a Saturday night game, not our northern boys. Like all good honest mackems Saturday night is a night for walking the whippet and checking the allotment before a gill or two at the club, a snack of prawns from the fish man before returning home, kippers in pocket, for MOTD then off to give the missus her weekly treat. Everything and everyone is conspiring against us, everyone..
You could always put your watch back 2.5 hours - so 5:30pm would still be 3pm on your watch.... routines solved
Syd, you should start a blog. In fact, you should have started one ages ago. Your thoughts (which are always a pleasure to read) would entertain not just us SAFC fans, but the WORLD! The world Syd! Remember the "week as a SAFC fan" you did on PF that got such a fantastic reaction? Come on man, do it (then when you're being quoted on major news sites and have 5 million followers on twitter, I can brag that I gave the world a superblogger).
Syd Interesting and......piquant. A few asides from myself are You say "..Today will be a day of ... bed changing ... for me" - I thought EVERY day was a bed changing day for you now? Also.... "Like all good honest mackems Saturday night is a night for walking the whippet and checking the allotment before a gill or two at the club, a snack of prawns from the fish man before returning home, kippers in pocket, for MOTD then off to give the missus her weekly treat" Personally I'd like to know how you manage to retain possession of the kippers on your way from pub/club to home (I never have - and have to backtrack the next morning, generally only to find 2 feral moggies spitting over ownership of said packet) and did your missus(es) ever want you to follow Durham CCC between May and August? Also ftao Ballin, you misspelled superblogger - there's NO L in the word with Syd ?
I live in a funny world. Ballin I dont understand these blogging things or I would, I like telling stories? Now Rokerlad, some very serious advive for you young man, kippers down front of trousers and tucked in under garments, keeps them secure, helps with posture and gives the kipper a unique flavour. Both my e wives loved the criket season because I followed normal routine but because I did not have MOTD it alloed time for one extra post duty woodbine. Reading good idea about the watch, would that make me early or late?
Syd - you are a genius with the "kippers in keks" idea - I'll start tonight mate If either of your ex's were like mine, I found a double tot of 140 proof home distillation did the trick for me. Instant blurred visibilty, a numbness that spread rapidly and a feeling of goodwill to all, allowing me to meet minimum required standard, and then be back downstairs to watch the late night film - all in 2 minutes 30 seconds
I think I have this right ... so right now it is 12:30pm - if you put your watch back 2.5 hours it would say 10am.... So at 3pm the normal Sat match time on your watch - it will actually be 5:30pm which is the actual kick off time So you can then do all your pre-match routines - at the same normal time (by your watch) - but just 2.5 hours later on
DMS - Saturday nights were classics when we were younger. I remember one lass I picked up for a "Pig Party" that kept a complete "fruit de mer" in hers - rank, never trusted shellfish since that night
WWY - Have you checked the New Mod thread? MackemsRule has suggested you as a possible replacement. How are u with that?
I don't go to the pub any more since the smoking ban was introduced. My Saturday routine involves postintg my Internet orders (my 3rd job) by 12:15 and then home for a full fry-up. 3 rashers of bacon, 2 pork sausages, 2 fried eggs on toast, sauteed mushrooms with sliced tomato, powdered garlic and mixed herbs, maybe some hashs browns if I am lucky. Then locked away for 2 hours watching SAFC on tinterweb. Will deffo be there March 20 for LFC at the SOL.
There are some reet f****** sadists on this board. You go on about a full english and MR (another thread) is going on about a crackin' Malt, I don't know if I should; a) Order something from a late nite takeaway, or b) Get the key for the padlock to the box where I stashed the LAST remaining bottle of my Old Fettercairn, or c) Never visit this forum again after 11 <headhurts>
b/ mate. The Fettercairn will help you sleep. People who say they don't like whisky should try a good malt on its own. I have converted two mates who swore down whisky was vile, drinking Bells and ginger beer is vile. They had never tried a smooth malt.
