Many years ago, I was walking towards my gate when a guy stopped to let his dog pee on it. He wasn’t too happy when I said I was going to follow him home and pee on his gate. I am pleased that you have seen the light and now go fully prepared, because dog pee, like any urine, can smell.
I must admit, I don't take water with me, but only let my dog pee on the grass or a lamppost. I pull him away from gates or walls. Though thinking about it lamp posts probablysmell, but he only pees there as he smells other dogs, so vicious circle.
In surgery for a heart attack, a middle-aged woman has a vision of God by her bedside. “Will I die?” she asks. God says, “No. You have 30 more years to live.” With 30 years to look forward to, she decides to make the best of it. Since she’s in the hospital, she gets breast implants, liposuction, a tummy tuck, hair transplants, and collagen injections in her lips. She looks great! The day she’s discharged, she exits the hospital with a swagger, crosses the street, and is immediately hit by an ambulance and killed. Up in heaven, she sees God. “You said I had 30 more years to live,” she complains. “That’s true,” says God. “So what happened?” she asks. God shrugs. “I didn’t recognize you.”
My wife stopped and asked, "You weren't even listening, we're you...?" I thought, "What an odd way to start a conversation!"
After a storm a religious old lady was at her bedroom window with the flood water just below. A man in a rowing boat said jump in love I will save you. No no said the old lady the lord will provide. A couple of hours later she is on the roof due to the flood water rising. Another man In a rowing boat said Jump in love I will save you. No no said the old lady the lord will provide. A little bit later the flood water is so high she is on the chimney. A rescue helicopter hovers above and the man said don't worry love I will save you. No no said the old lady the lord will provide. The old lady drowns and she is at the gates of heaven shouting at St Peter demanding to see God. So he takes her to see God. Where the hell were you when I needed you? She shouted at God? Calm down replied God. I sent you two rowing boats and a Helicopter.
Yeah was brilliant thanks. My car was buggered annoyingly so had to take my old dears, though she was happy for me to see monkeys so that was a nice bonus Also saw the tigers running around and playing with each other which was pretty incredible tbh. Never seen that before.
How on earth did you ever consider that to be funny. That is totally out of order at a time when so many old people are dying from Covid19. How can you have been so insensitive as to see something so sick as humorous? That is in the very poorest of taste and to be honest I am astonished that the moderators have allowed it to remain on this thread. I thought I could sometimes be insensitive but that well and truly takes the ****ing biscuit.
Weren't you talking about people killing themselves yesterday purely because they voted a different way to you? In a much less jokey manner than the above I might add. Pot kettle black old man...
There is absolutely no comparison. One is saying your old and your going to die which is inevitable but making light of it is positively uncaring and to use a child to portray such thoughts is positively sick. The other mocks a man who was stupid enough to put the country in a mess and he is so distressed it is suggested people need to look out for him which is being very caring.