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Off Topic Neighbours

Discussion in 'Newcastle United' started by Hung Drawn and Quartered, May 25, 2020.

  1. Ghostinthehouse

    Ghostinthehouse Well-Known Member

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    He's a bandit, just wait and see when he suggests playing for a fiver a hole. <laugh>
     
    #21
  2. cronemeister

    cronemeister Well-Known Member

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    I only have one set of neighbours as I'm an end hoose so have a nice big muckle garden at the side of my gaff which no ****er else in the street has. Neighbours are sound, early 60's and their kids have flown the nest. He's a toon fan so we have a bit banter about footy and likes a beer so nee issues for me.

    Heard some right horror stories over the years about neighbours so I count myself very fortunate. Theres no place in this world for ****y neighbours like and no excuse for it.
     
    #22
  3. Dorty Dogbreath

    Dorty Dogbreath keeper of the glow

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    I will empty his pockets <laugh> First hole I blast 280 yards down the fairway and he crumbles <laugh>
     
    #23
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  4. jimileysbaldhead

    jimileysbaldhead Well-Known Member

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    Why use an 8 iron off the first?
     
    #24
  5. Dorty Dogbreath

    Dorty Dogbreath keeper of the glow

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    <laugh> That's into a 50mph wind Jim. Do you still have a knock mate?
     
    #25
  6. Albert's Chip Shop

    Albert's Chip Shop Top Grafter
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    Mackem on one side who takes wood from private land and burns it with bark on to create so much smoke all other neighbours have to close windows etc.. he does this most nights the ****.. but recently he stopped. I’m assuming he’s realised the error of his ways or has been grassed your. Also... he doesn’t get up till after lunch.. the dosser... so when i’m in the garden pottering on first thing I blast out AC/DC to given him a nice wake up.

    the other side I have a lovely family from Croydon who are really canny folk and join in the banter.
     
    #26
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  7. Dorty Dogbreath

    Dorty Dogbreath keeper of the glow

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    ****s who have fires in their gardens <grr>
     
    #27
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  8. LiamO

    LiamO Well-Known Member

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    Which course? Ladies tees? Pick n drop or placing? Either way it's not official<laugh>
     
    #28
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  9. Schlem Boogerman

    Schlem Boogerman Well-Known Member

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    The couple one side are spot on. They moved in 20 years ago when we did and we've always got on well.
    The other side it's swings and roundabouts. Good point is that she's an old dear living alone and most of the time she's very quiet, we live in a semi detached so that's good.
    On the down side she's a bit of a twat and never liked me from day one. Her husband who died a few years back was fine, we even played golf together.
    So, she flatly refuses to take any parcels in for us. Even one of the delivery drivers mentioned what a twat she was. We take in her packages, no problem.
    She has two very large trees in her back garden which block most of the sun from our garden. A couple of years ago they got so big it blocked my satellite signal so had to move my dish. Cost about 100. I overheard one neighbour asking her why I had to move my dish and she pissed herself laughing telling them it was her trees. Nice.
    We live on a slight slope. Her house is below ours. We put a drive in (we have 2 cars and the estate road is narrow) at the same time we extended and converted the garage.
    Anyway she decided it would be a good idea to put a line of cemented bricks across the path that runs directly in front of the house to prevent any natural run off from my drive. She was also adamant I'd blocked off one of my drains when building my extension and this was causing excess water. I hadn't. Anyway wasn't that bothered as the run off wasn't that great and wasn't causing damp/flooding so let it be.
    It did, however become a problem when we had a burst water main on our drive a couple of years back and large amounts of water and there was potential for flooding because of her blocking the path. So, I went around and asked very politely if she would mind in this emergency if I tapped one of the line of bricks out so that our house wouldn't be flooded. She just stood there and said "I'll think about it". I shrugged my shoulders and walked off.
    She also accuse me of stealing her land when I replaced the old fence between our house. She reckoned I'd stolen an inch. I hadn't. She reckoned I should have also put the boards facing her garden. The rails on the old fence were facing towards my garden. I didn't give it a second thought. Boards go on the rails, end of.
    To put her into perspective, when we were replacing the fence at the bottom of our garden those neighbours came out and insisted payin in full for the fence. Lovely people.
    She's a TWAT.
     
    #29
  10. Hung Drawn and Quartered

    Hung Drawn and Quartered Well-Known Member

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    I am trying to understand what your neighbour has done with regards to adding bricks to the front of the house
    she could only do this if they were on her land, if they have been put on your land you can remove them and bill the lady
    also if the bricks are above ground level on the public footpath, contact the council
    they would also need planning permission to do this on council land (serious penalties involved if no permission) Photo's say a thousand words

    the fact that you have put the 'boards' facing 'your garden' has in fact given her extra inches of garden than you (depending on width of the posts)
    and you have in fact built a fence that is now 'legally hers'

    Disclaimer:- I am not a solicitor and all views are my own <laugh>

    but I spent 5 years fighting a land border dispute and did some serious research in those 5 years
     
    #30
    Last edited: May 29, 2020
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  11. Schlem Boogerman

    Schlem Boogerman Well-Known Member

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    The path runs directly across the front of our houses. Think postman walks along this path as a shortcut rather than walking back up my path then down hers.
    The bricks are laid on her land but the block the natural flow of any rainwater that would flow from my land to hers with my house being uphill of hers.
     
    #31
  12. Dorty Dogbreath

    Dorty Dogbreath keeper of the glow

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    <laugh> Ha ha nice one mate...but none of those. I've learnt hit straight and putt well lowers your score massively. And playing everyday certainly helps <laugh>
     
    #32
  13. Hung Drawn and Quartered

    Hung Drawn and Quartered Well-Known Member

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    she is entitled to do this unfortunately (she Is protecting her property from ingress of water)
    you may have to dig up some of your land near to her land without causing any damage and fill with some ballast to allow water to well and naturally disperse into the ground (it should look like a pebble path to others) The bigger the trench the more water it would hold, If you are talking about Tarmac drive to Tarmac drive which is causing the problem then you would need to get a drainage trench built from your land to the main street, you need to speak to a builder if you are not capable of doing this on your own
     
    #33
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  14. Schlem Boogerman

    Schlem Boogerman Well-Known Member

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    Good to know and good idea, something I could do myself. It's not really an issue tbh which is why I didn't follow it up when she did it. The issue was when there was a risk of my house being flooded because she was unwilling to let me temporarily take a brick out to take the water level down.
     
    #34
  15. Dorty Dogbreath

    Dorty Dogbreath keeper of the glow

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    Your neighbour sounds like an old trout, mate.
     
    #35
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  16. Hung Drawn and Quartered

    Hung Drawn and Quartered Well-Known Member

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    If this is not an everyday issue but could happen 3-4 times a year, (winter time, flash flooding etc)
    It maybe worth doing it whilst on Lockdown (if you have time) to prevent it in the future and not worry what the old bat will do next <ok>
     
    #36
  17. Ben 10

    Ben 10 Well-Known Member

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    Next time you take in a parcel for her, put some poison in it
     
    #37
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  18. Dorty Dogbreath

    Dorty Dogbreath keeper of the glow

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    This old trout is the tree-hugger type, woe betide anyone who wants to touch those branches. By comparison, my neighbour paid a lot of money to have a big tree felled that was causing problems. Old ****.
     
    #38
  19. Hung Drawn and Quartered

    Hung Drawn and Quartered Well-Known Member

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    If you want rid of any large tree, wait until bonfire night, set fire to it and the Fire brigade will chop it down free of charge, so I am led to believe <whistle>
     
    #39
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  20. Schlem Boogerman

    Schlem Boogerman Well-Known Member

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    Yeah, I'll get my big grinder out and cut a hole in the concrete just after she's had her windows cleaned :bandit:
     
    #40

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