Newcastle's Secret Striker

There's been a lot of articles floating around about our lack of strikers, but I think people have forgotten that we have an "impact sub" of our own on the books already. He played as a striker at youth level, and played as an emergency striker during the Roeder era in Europe, and almost got on the scoresheet!

So we don't need to bother getting a rubbish Frenchman on a free, step forward:


Mr. Steve Harper!

 

We're gonna need to see a significant improvement on his goal celebrations first!

His people's elbow was simply below par. ha

 

Let's not forget that Steve is personally responsible for the unavailabilty of some of our strikers.

He managed to crock Best in a 'celebration' and also forced Andy to move with his Jedi mind tricks.

I fear that Ranger's injury will just keep coming back as Steve helps with the pyhsio and Lovenkrands will 'slip' on a misplaced keepers glove in the showers.

He'll not stop until there is only one!!

 

Making his claim for the No 9 shirt one victim at a time.

 

Sounds like the plot to a low budget new genre of film, mixing sport with horror.

 

I got the idea fore the new genre when I went to Boro

 

haha

I reckon we could scrape some money together, and make it. not606 presents...[insert title film here]

 

Maybe the misplaced glove in the showers was put there for another reason and there's a side to Harps that we don't know about!

 

Steve Harper: Goalkiller?

 

What happens if Pardew puts Tioté up front before turning to Harper? Surely not even Harper could devise a plan devious enough to bring down such a foe.

 

Tiote heard that Harps was going to try to take him down. Realising that Harps is a much loved servant of the Toon Army he didnt want to upset his public so instead he used Jedi Mind tricks to make Harps think that Leon Best was the one he really wanted to out.

 

Thanks, guys, that's the best laugh I've had in a while!

 

I'm pretty sure I posted this about a week ago.