Sissoko's birthday today. Winning goal tomorrow is now nailed on. Drive through the middle, bulldozes everyone in his way, dinks Ederson, rips off his shirt with a "who's your daddy" one underneath.
@PleaseNotPoll told me to write this so blame him! So here we are again, about to play Credit Card FC. There are several irritating certainties about this fixture. Some worse than others but all annoying nonetheless. 1. Walker will come out with yet another version about why he left and how it was impossible for him to stay. 2. He who must not be criticised will use the word "incredible" with an annoying frequency. 3. Pundits will claim that although although "Pep" (you must call he who must not be criticised by his first name cos he is an incredible man) "has spent a bit...it is incredible how he has chosen such great players." 4. No pundit will say ... "A BIT OF MONEY...SERIOUSLY ... A F.U.C.K.I.N.G. BIT???" "£192.5m to get 4th in 2016-17??? £287.7m for the title & league cup 17/18 £70.7m for the domestic treble in 18/19 £151.5m for this season... That's a FECKING TRUCK LOAD OF MONEY...OVER £700M ... IN ****ING CREDI ****ING BLE.." "And then he actually whines about not being able to afford Maguire???...what a prize twat." 5. City fans will continue their quest to be as incredibly quiet as any criticism of Pep buying every trophy in England. 6. No one will criticise any of the constant fouls city do in the oppostion half to kill breaks. 7. Pundits will talk about city's beautiful winning football while ignoring the fact they spent nearly THREE QUARTERS OF A BILLION POUNDS on it. If you spent £700m on educating Paul Merson he would actually be able to string a sentence together that made sense...MONEY CAN DO ANYTHING FFS. 8. No one will tell He Who Must Not Be Criticised that "City did NOT win four trophies cos the Community Shield is NOT, and has NEVER been a trophy...it is a glorified friendly...so wind your neck in and accept that youare just a richer version of Roberto Martinez." On the pitch the expected city team and formation is: GK (£40m) RB(£50m) CB(£45m) CB(£39m) LB(£52m) DM (£55m) MF(£60m) MF (£65m) MF(£60m) F (£60m) F (£50m) As you can see, it takes a great tactical mind to find such talent and mould them into a winning team. Pochettino plans on using his latest tactic against city...leave Eriksen on the bench and Vertonghen out of the squad so that (in the absence of Son) the opposition get a goal lead lulling them into a false sense of security until the last 20 minutes ...worked a treat v Villa so what could go wrong trying it against city? Finally, I was going to round this off with an incredible true story involving Kyle Walker, John Sones, He Who Must Not Be Criticised, a donkey, a police helmet, a bucket of soapy water, two dozen frogs, a Harry Potter costume, Edwina Currie and Theresa May in Arsensl kits and the Australian Cricket Team...unfortunately I have been warned by @Spurf that (as the video shows his face too) I will be banned if I do so ... after which he'll hunt me down and go Hannibal Lecter on my ass.
In any discussion about Spurs "having to win trophys" it will not be mentioned that Citeh can get to the final of the FA Cup and League Cup having played only one premier league team (and still needed ref help in one of those games in particular to progress). Of course, should Citeh fail to win everything, which is actually a failure when you think about it, the word "failure" will not be mentioned. If Spurs "fail" to win a trophy again, the word failure will be mentioned many times.
Match broadcasters thank you for this new Citeh player identification scheme. With all those "exotic" player names, tis far easier to say "GK-40m clears to MF-60m" during commentary.
I kept checking all day yesterday. Then I missed the posting of this thread by15 minutes and didn't get to post first as a result. Damn you all.
In the 2019-20 Paul Stewart Cup, there may need to be a rule change. Specifically that contestants must post at least one sensible comment per week on a football-related non-match day article on Spurs 606. Think of it as akin to the EFL changing the decades old League Cup SF format.
Good to hear Poch saying he is happy to select Eriksen despite speculation over his future. Without Son or Alli and with Lo Celso unlikely to start tomorrow, the Dane will be crucial and I hope he starts.
Pochettino said that he won't. May be in the squad, but definitely won't start. Watch him make me look stupid now by picking him.
No-brainer all round. Suspensions. .Fitness levels, Opposition quality. 2 week shop window for Eriksen to dance in.
We have a 20 man squad to choose from with no injuries other than Mendy and Sane I think we start with EDERSON WALKER STONES LAPORTE ZINCHENKO BERNARDO RODRI DEBRUYNE MAHREZ AGUERO STERLING SUBS from BRAVO, OTAMENDI , FERNANDINHO SILVA ,CANCELO, JESUS, GUNDOGAN FODEN,ANGELINO probably miss out
Pundits still can't bring themselves to consider suggesting that Saltypool bottled the league last season...
In the days before Citeh cashed their lottery cheque. I love the following comment : "It was at this moment the sheiks realised they need to spend 1 billion" .
