The Chelsea Spiral Watch (limited to the 2019/20 season)

All the players are stars fatty, that's why we win cups and leagues ya hilarious balloon.

 

I’m banking on it. Will be unbearable if I lose consecutive bets on the trot to Bob.

 

Whereas you will never be ok.

 

Sad isn't he?

 

Chelsea and West Ham are eyeing a deal to sign Portsmouth's 18-year-old winger Leon Maloney who scored 26 goals for Pompey's academy side last season. (Sun)

Woah!!

Why are Chavs looking at players?

They’re doing fcuk all business, this season.

 

Huddersfield are looking at signing Chelsea's 20-year-old England youth international midfielder Trevoh Chalobah on a permanent deal. (Goal)

Yep, you can sell.

But that’s as far as it goes, yeah?

This is a party that you boys aren’t invited to.

 

Neither club is looking to sign him.

 

Yeah, but at least you could, Ern.

 

no we couldn't, we already spunked out wad on Fornals and Haller, and, as I told you the other day, the last type of player we'll be after is a attack minded midfielder. We have a squad full of them, why would we want more?
You really need to stop reading The Sun and The Mail, nothing in them is true.

 

In my defence, though Ern, I’m interested only in the wum value.

 

tbh quoting stuff from those rags isn't wumable.

just list Arsenal's squad, that'll do it.

 

Chelsea are set to raise £200m to spend on new signings this year as they wait for their transfer ban to end. (Goal)

This will come as reassuring news to the Chav youngsters.

 

Nice to see that your obsession with us is still going strong.

 

HIAG is like a bird, crash dieting and putting on weight again

 

Fat Frank OUT!

 

Come back Cahill! All is forgiven

 

Lampard v Man Utd today in gif form.