Left university in 1981 with a couple of degrees in Geology and a love of Newcastle United. Spent the early 80's working in North Wales then spent the next few years working overseas in the States and South America before being transferred to Indonesia. Been here almost 30years, the last 20 as one of the business owners. Kids live and work in UK, while wife travels back and forth and I get back 2-3 times a year. Starting to think about retirement back in UK now but haven't figured out a way to do it yet and continue the business. Probably stay here another 3-4 years and then move back to Manchester.
Grew up on a ****ty council estate in South London. Used to get my kicks going to footie on Saturdays. Took a lot of LSD as a teenager and turned into a Hippie. Moved away from London to go to University in the midlands, spent most of the time getting stoned, eating magic mushrooms and clubbing. Left Uni and didn't have a clue what to do so went travelling to Mexico for a few months, ended up in Guatamala and met some people there who introduced me to DMT and spent the next few years travelling between Central/South America and UK, working on the festival circuit at Glastonbury, Reading, etc cooking for a company called Manic Organic, saving up enough money to get back to South America to take more psychedelics. Eventually moved back to London and got a job teaching Pottery/Ceramics for groups of people with physical/sensory impairments. That got me into studying mental health and I took some more qualifications. Then did a 6 month stint with a mental health charity in New York and would have stayed on there but they ran out of money. Moved back to the UK met a beautiful girl and then moved to Cornwall with her to learn to surf. Started playing Bass guitar again (tinkered with it as a teen) and started playing in a Ska band and then later in a funk/jazz band. Got a job working for the NHS in mental health, thought about settling down, but got the travel bug again. Did a few trips to California, Indonesia, New York again. Then got a dog, got married, had a kid, got bored with my job so ditched it to start my own business. Love travelling still. Went to British Columbia last year, still a big world out there to be discovered.
The details of my life are quite inconsequential. Very well, where do I begin? My father was a relentlessly self-improving boulangerie owner from Belgium with low grade narcolepsy and a penchant for buggery. My mother was a fifteen year old French prostitute named Chloe with webbed feet. My father would womanize, he would drink. He would make outrageous claims like he invented the question mark. Sometimes he would accuse chestnuts of being lazy. The sort of general malaise that only the genius possess and the insane lament. My childhood was typical. Summers in Rangoon, luge lessons. In the spring we'd make meat helmets. When I was insolent I was placed in a burlap bag and beaten with reeds, pretty standard really. At the age of twelve I received my first scribe. At the age of fourteen a Zoroastrian named Vilma ritualistically shaved my testicles. There really is nothing like a shorn scrotum, it's breathtaking, I highly suggest you try it.
Was born in a coal bunker and remained there up until I was 14, surviving on coal, coal soup, coal al forno, coalcumber and flans. Got a job working for a stay-at-home shoplifter, and learned the very basic principles of procurement. I was paid handsomely for my few hours work, acquiring stationary from Woolworths at a huge (100%) discount, I would spend my youth swimming in my local pool and celebrating not drowning each time by enjoying a fresh tomato soup from the vending machine occasionally the machine was out of water but the dust tasted just as nice anyway. My mother enjoyed travelling so would take us to far and away places such as Butlins and Pontins, and the odd long haul to the exotic isle of Scarborough. I had to grow up before long so after my setback of being rejected for the bins because I was colourblind, I decided to go into amateur finance, a corner of the market which I made my own. Nobody had thought of this before, a cost effective system of unqualified money management. It started off quietly, I was struggling to pay my bills but after 6 months I got my first order from a lovely lady named Dianne, then the second one come in from the Magistrates Court, although my office was closed down shortly afterwards for reasons unbeknownst to me. I think had the Internet been available to me and my geographic location not hindered my chances, this would have made me the next Tim Apple. Since then I’ve mostly been bobbing from A to B, spreading the positive vibe and making folk happy. Overall I’d grade myself a B- but there’s always room for improvement.
Left school and signed straight up. My proudest moment soon turned to my most disappointed moment when I was jailed and given a dishonourable discharge. **** happens in the forces and I flew into a rage with a knife. Little did I know that was only the beginning of my violent ****ed up life. My 20's was pretty much a waste. Lost a couple jobs and arrested dozens of times. I lived a life of crime in my 20's and some of the stuff I went through, I know I'm lucky to be alive. One night I got taxed with a few grand. I'd arranged to meet some lad and when I showed up at the flat the front door was locked straight behind me and out come the knives. The next half an hour wasn't nice. I came out that flat with a few bruises, a few grand down and my pride smashed into pieces. That's when I backed out from the life I was living. Not because I was scared but I knew if I went looking for revenge again, it would end up really messy and I couldn't be arsed with the **** anymore. During my late 20's, I used some money I'd held back and went into property with my brother. I really enjoyed that but that game isn't all its cracked up to be. It's a long hard slog and the profits were never what I wanted. I guess it just wasn't for me. Along the way my older family and best mate all died in the space of 10 year. It's been crazy. At times I feel sorry for myself and other times I'm overcome with anger. I know that neither are any good for me. I'm currently more settled than I've ever been. I've got a top girlfriend, nice house, decent business and nice holidays. I've got to keep going because a melt down and me losing everything suddenly, is only around the corner. I know I've got to keep focused and maintain the support network around me because it's working. I know people think my stories on here are bullshit, but they really aren't. I've lived a very active life and I try to keep it as real as possible on here.
Keep going mate, you make a difference. You helped me personally when I needed it and I'll never forget that
Saffs a loveable rogue...pisses me off when he doesn't turn up to his own threads though. Worst one is when he organises Not606 parties then forgets about them.
