It all kicked off at Junior's footie match on Saturday. One of the other parents started having a go at one of ours and next thing you know we are surrounded (ok, three of them but they were fat) by Pikeys who wanted to smash everyone including their own team's parents and even threatened to punch one of the Mums. We jape and we jest about various folks on here but honestly I haven't met a more loathsome race of people than Pikeys.
I was thinking that none of them could have run after me, all three were a tad lardy, but up close I'd have most certainly gone down like a sack of tatties if one of them landed a left hook on my chin. As linesman I couldn't possibly cross the respect line as this would have been a serious breach of my duty as a match official. To sum up, I did indeed sh.it it but in fairness so did everyone else apart from the Mum who also got threatened with an Aldo.
We all take turns as there are never any real linesmen. Just a bunch of middle aged men who don't know what the offside rule is trying to huff and puff up and down the line in a vain attempt to keep up with sprinting 10 year olds. Not that I've ever had any practice chasing kids in the park
Anyone of you could have kept up with a 10 year old Grove, I was never that fast a runner. I much preferred accepting lifts in the back of strangers' vans.