I bought a latte in Costa Coffee this morning, the lady serving said, "Sorry, we don't take fifty pound notes!" So I had to give her two twenties and a ten.
Global warming is a worry to me . One of the main greenhouse gases is methane from cattle and livestock . If we cut the legs off cows, and put them on skateboards we would have lower emissions.
The young couple across the road from me have made an explicit sex tape. They just don’t know about it yet.
Every time I drive past a field of cows, my wife leans out the window shouting abuse. Turns out she is dairy intolerant.
Congratulations to my wife on reaching a new culinary milestone. Today she set off the neighbours smoke alarm!
