Off Topic Two tickets for Man Utd - Newcastle available

@Beardsley's Stylist has had to forego his winnings from the World Cup Prediction League so the two tickets are now available and being offered as part of a competition.

Finish the following phrase in no more than 20 words

I would like to watch Newcastle spend 90mins defending desperately at Old Trafford because....................


Rules
1. No purchase necessary
2. The competition is not open to any of the Moderators or their families
3. All entries must be received by Saturday 29th September at 5pm UK time (and dont forget your Prediction League entries this week either)
4. The winner will be chosen by a panel comprising the Board Moderators. Their decision will be final.
5. Tickets will be delivered by post to an address provided by the winner (by PM) on Thursday 4th October and will need to be returned after the game
6. Winner agrees to not go dressed in Newcastle United kit, to cheer silently in the unlikely event that we do score and to talk only in a Manc accent to people sitting nearby
6. Competition only open to Newcastle Supporters and Captain Chaos

 

......it is the only game of the season Mourinho will allow his players to attack

 

Jakarta Toon is the wittiest, most handsome and sexiest (in a manly way) poster in the whole of the World.



Posted on behalf of a friend.

 

That's more like it - just hope your friend isn't a Moderator. However knowing the other Moderators I think I can confirm that is the case.

 

Wow! I've literally just upgraded my laptop and didn't realise technology had advanced to being able to smell over the internet!

 

What's that supposed to mean?

 

I would like to watch Newcastle spend 90mins defending desperately at Old Trafford because.........it will probably the last chance to do so in my lifetime







I'm not old, we're just ****.

 

... my brother is a Man Utd fan and I forgot his birthday

 

I would like to watch Newcastle spend 90mins defending desperately at Old Trafford because....................

I want to touch Fellaini's hair and rub my face on it like a soft pillow.

 

Are weirdo's allowed to compete?

 

.....because it will be my one and only chance to ever see them play....unless I go out and marry an old billionaire

 

.... because watching us try and attack is too painful

 

cough cough who won the tickets originally but will be in Bali?? dunno why you dont just go third then fourth etc until someone can go

 

Its more fun this way.



Also next on the list was Chaos and I would be worried he would do something that would get my tickets revoked.

 

Enjoy Bali mate. Should be a bit quieter now. I have the ultimate working holiday coming up shortly. A week in the field in Timor Leste. One of the most spectacular places I have ever visited.

 

I will have had at least 15 cans in me so quite frankly won’t even realise I’m at the match.

Plus I havent seen Jak for a while and think it’s my round.

Or maybe I’m round.

 

Reference dress code. If we can’t wear our colours and need to blend in... so we need to wear parkas and walk swinging our arms saying ‘suuuuunnnnshhhhiiiiiinnneee’ and ‘manchesta coming at yor’?

 

My wife nags the **** our of me and I need to get away from her for my own mental health’s sake.

 

I thought you didn’t have friends?

 

Thanks, go and blow it for me....