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To smack, or not to smack?

Discussion in 'The Premier League' started by Libby, Sep 12, 2018.

  1. Libby

    Libby Derby County, we're coming for you

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    Fresh calls for the smacking of children in the home to be outlawed:

    Smacking is harmful to children's mental health and should be banned, school psychologists say.

    The Association of Educational Psychologists has tabled a motion to the TUC Conference calling for physical punishment to be outlawed.

    Presently, although corporal punishment is banned in schools, parents can "smack" or physically chastise a child as long as it is deemed "reasonable".

    Psychologists say there are many better ways of teaching right from wrong.

    Member of the AEP national executive committee, John Drewicz, will tell the conference in Manchester: "Smacking is harmful to a child's mental health, it models aggressive behaviour and it says to them that it is OK to use violence."

    He will add: "Sixty countries already have full bans, including Sweden, Ireland, Spain, Germany and Portugal, and it is time to make violence against children illegal in the UK in all settings, including the home."

    The motion also notes that the Welsh government is taking steps towards removing the defence of reasonable chastisement for parents.

    But some campaigners have argued that parents would be criminalised if a smacking ban were to be passed.

    There are also moves in the Scottish Parliament to ban physical chastisement of children.

    'Higher aggression'
    A bill, lodged by Green MSP John Finnie, has been backed by the government and looks certain to pass at Holyrood.

    Psychologists cite research suggesting that when force is used by parents, there are changes in their brain activity which mean the degree of force used on the child can escalate.

    They argue that physical chastisement also leads to a lower quality of parent-child relationship, poorer mental health in childhood and adulthood, as well as higher levels of aggression in the child and more anti-social behaviour.

    The biggest teaching union, the National Education Union, is seconding the motion.

    Dr Mary Bousted, joint general secretary of the union, said parents and carers had a right to set boundaries for their children to help them develop social skills and good behaviour.

    "However we need to ensure that children are legally safeguarded in their own homes.

    "We are not talking about dictating to parents how this is done but what we are saying is that it in 2018 beating children in anger, or as part of a pre-meditated punishment, is neither acceptable or defensible."




    Thoughts on this?

    I can see both sides and agree it's undoubtedly a good thing that parents can't just beat their kids senseless but I'm not sure how I feel about it being outlawed completely. Does anyone on here have young kids who they outright will/won't smack for whatever reason?

    I have done it once or twice in extreme situations but never hard enough to mark (or really hurt) and I've hated myself each time despite not using much force, not for a while now though. I don't agree with parents who do it regularly as then not only does the child get used to it so it's no longer a punishment but it also normalises that sort of behaviour which will affect the child in later life.
     
    #1
  2. A.L.D.O 4.1

    A.L.D.O 4.1 1 of the top defendants in Europe

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    OP certainly needs a smack.

    ****.
     
    #2
  3. Libby

    Libby Derby County, we're coming for you

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    Someone does an OP with the word with smack in it and Aldo the Sweatie turns up...

    Coincidence?

    please log in to view this image
     
    #3
  4. A.L.D.O 4.1

    A.L.D.O 4.1 1 of the top defendants in Europe

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    I just happened to be passing through, checking out who was gaying this place up these days and guess wit...

    It was you.

    <laugh>
     
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  5. Archers Road

    Archers Road Urban Spaceman

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    In Glasgow giving smack to kids is considered pretty normal. In the rest of Scotland, a Mars Bar dipped in whisky does the job
     
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  6. luvgonzo

    luvgonzo Pisshead

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    Smacked all my kids when they were little if they did something dangerous, my thoughts were that the shock will stop then doing it again.
     
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  7. NSIS

    NSIS Well-Known Member

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    Only ever remember slapping my kids once after something particularly naughty.

    Usually a bark at them was enough to keep them in line.

    Given the size of em now, I’m glad I didn’t belt em!..
     
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  8. Star of David Bardsley

    Star of David Bardsley 2023 Funniest Poster

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    Bet they stopped hiding your Mars bars after that.
     
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  9. Chief

    Chief Northern Simpleton
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    I've never done it to any of my three but the Mrs does very occasionally. It does the trick and it certainly doesn't hurt them, gives them a wake up that they've done something especially bad.

    Shocks me when I see it too, can't lie.

    I just up the decibels and put on a frown, that seems to sort them out although they do often laugh ffs.
     
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  10. remembercolinlee

    remembercolinlee Well-Known Member

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    Tbh it is really difficult to discuss this subject face to face let alone on line.

    Everyone agrees that beating kids is different from slapping them...apart from child beating scum ... and they don't count... so **** them.

    I have never slapped my kids cos I did not see the point. I raise my voice when necessary but believe it is important that kids grow up to know that no one has the right to hit them and that violence is not the answer unless it is self defence.

    The trouble with saying this is that people can assume I am calling them bad parents or child beaters etc.

    Imho a far far bigger problem is how parents emotionally **** their kids around. They scream at them, swear at them, pick them up from school and ignore them while talking on the phone etc.
    A walk past any school in the morning shows people treating their kids like that as does a walk through most shopping areas after school.
    But I guess that's a different issue.
     
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  11. Tel (they/them)

    Tel (they/them) Sucky’s Bailiff

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    I got the belt, that hurt like ****. I was a little **** though, believe it or not.
     
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  12. PINKIE

    PINKIE Wurzel Gummidge

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    Never smacked my daughter and never would. She knows when I'm getting frustrated with her because I tell her and I warn her that if she carries on she will get in trouble. That's usually enough to nip it in the bud. But sometimes it isn't and she pushes it to the point where I raise my voice and tell her off, then she cries and tells me I've hurt her feelings and I end up feeling like a ****. Works though :)
     
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  13. luvgonzo

    luvgonzo Pisshead

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    Here's an idea how about we just leave parents do the parenting and concentrate on the people who beat the **** out of kids.
     
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  14. PINKIE

    PINKIE Wurzel Gummidge

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    Agreed. I don't smack and I don't really like seeing it tbh, but every parent manages their role differently.
    It's a completely different thing from child beating altogether, and the ****s that do that deserve to be stoned to death imo.
     
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  15. Saintmagic

    Saintmagic Well-Known Member

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    I used to get hit with all sorts. Started off with just a slap, but I soon got used to that and stupidly laughed at my mum when she did it so she upped the ante. I can remember both sides of a hair brush being used, a "diamond" ring and a ruler off the top of my head. The spiky bit of the hairbrush was the worst, still have a small scar from the ring.

    But I am now the socially well adjusted person you see before you, and I was a complete little **** when I was a kid. Getting hit never stopped me from being like that, I just chilled out naturally about 14 or so, coincidentally when I started smoking weed.
     
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  16. PINKIE

    PINKIE Wurzel Gummidge

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    Beaten as a child, druggie by 14 and claiming it all helped him to become a 'socially well adjusted person' :bandit:
     
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  17. PINKIE

    PINKIE Wurzel Gummidge

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    <laugh>
     
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  18. Saintmagic

    Saintmagic Well-Known Member

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    All part of the process I think. I have no idea if I would hit my kids if I had any, depends how much they pissed me off.
     
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  19. PINKIE

    PINKIE Wurzel Gummidge

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    Yeah I was only messing. I think there are all sorts of factors that go into shaping a person's personality and character. My personal opinion is that smacking your child doesn't help as it teaches them to resolve issues with physical force rather than communicating. A stern word in a voice than means it usually does the trick, and to be honest, once you smack it's actually a sign that you've lost your temper and are taking out your frustration on the child.
     
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  20. brb

    brb CR250

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    Disagree with smacking, it's an adult not in control of the situation or of their own emotions, so resorts to violence instead, the very thing we teach our kids is wrong later in life <doh>

    For example how hard do you smack, only gently, but how big or strong is the person applying the smack, they may not know their own strength, how many times do they smack, once, twice, three times, what part of the body, how in control are they are of their emotions, would they do it while another adult was present, if so, how uncomfortable must that feel for the other person, or do they do it in private behind four walls where most child abuse occurs.

    Why was the smack applied, was it to protect the child from danger or was it you lost your ability to teach the child in a less emotional way, right from wrong.

    If i came up and applied a gentle smack to your child, you would knock me spark out and quite rightly so, but.....you think it's ok to do it yourself, interesting <ok>
     
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