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My ****ty ratings for a ****ty performance

Discussion in 'Newcastle United' started by Darren Peacock’s Ponytail, Aug 18, 2018.

  1. Darren Peacock’s Ponytail

    Darren Peacock’s Ponytail Well-Known Member

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    Dubravka - 6 - looked shaky at times but they had nothing of note to trouble him
    Manqillo - 9 - got himself injured, a blessing in disguise. In all seriousness though where the **** was Sterry?
    Lascelles - 6 - looked a dick at that free kick towards the end. Again wasn't really troubled.
    Clark - 6 - seemed fairly anonymous to me.
    Dummett - 5 - his usual poor self. Defensively not his usual good self and as usual his attacking was ****e
    Ritchie - 6 - poor throughout but did more than Kennedy
    Shelvey - 7 - did well but needs a better partner than Diame
    Diame - 6 - did well in spurts but we need a replacement for him quick sharp (or in 2 years or whenever his contract expires0
    Kennedy - 1 - 0 passes to another player in the first half, keeps doing that ****ty primary school playground turns, had a ****e freekick, had a ****er penalty, oh and he should have been sent off - needs a kick up the arse Jamaal!
    Perez - 4 - second to worst player on the pitch - Cardiff dealt with him sublimely
    Joselu - 5 - literally NO servcie, not sure what he could have done.

    Hayden - 5 - harsh red card and did little of note otherwise
    Murphy - 5 - rose to the challenge, not!
    Muto - 6 - bonus point for actually getting a cross in, can't remember another player attempting that this game.

    Rafa - 4 - poor selection of Manqillo, kept on Kennedy, tactics looked piss poor (either that or all 10 outfield players ignored them), yet another season where we have numerous wingers and none of them cross the fecking ball.


    On the plus side - we have 1 point!!
     
    #1
    Dorty Dogbreath likes this.
  2. General Lee Speaking

    General Lee Speaking Well-Known Member

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    VERY generous scores there DPP.
     
    #2
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  3. Darren Peacock’s Ponytail

    Darren Peacock’s Ponytail Well-Known Member

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    I know - but we got a point and we didn't concede.
     
    #3
  4. TheJudeanPeoplesFront

    TheJudeanPeoplesFront Well-Known Member

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    Dubravka - 5 - No real saves to make. One dodgey moment but otherwise nowt to say.

    Lascelles - 7
    Clark - 7
    Dummett - 7
    These lads were fine. Nothing wrong with how they played. They defended well for 90 mins, Zahore got away from them once.

    Ritchie - 6 - He's my favourite player of the current crop. Milneresque in that he gives 100% every game.

    All the rest get 0. Genuinely, they were garbage.

    Of the subs, Hayden should never wear the shirt again, but nobody will ever buy him, and Muto looks like he will never adapt to this league, he looked like a little kid out there.
     
    #4
  5. Darren Peacock’s Ponytail

    Darren Peacock’s Ponytail Well-Known Member

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    Yeah the defence did nothing wrong but they had nothing to really do either. Dummett, I disagree with, he was way off the mark.

    Didn't think Ritchie gave 100%, is far too moody and for a winger can't cross the ball.
     
    #5
  6. TheJudeanPeoplesFront

    TheJudeanPeoplesFront Well-Known Member

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    He is left-footed, but plays on the right wing. Reason being we have **** Right backs who can't defend and Ritchie busts a lung every game. That should be the minimum standard for our ****e players, but each and every single other player I haven't rated might as well not have played.
     
    #6
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  7. TheJudeanPeoplesFront

    TheJudeanPeoplesFront Well-Known Member

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    Oh and Rafa gets 0 for both playing Manquillo, agreeing to sign Manquillo, playing Hayden and agreeing to buy Hayden. I thought he must have been high not to change things tactically.
     
    #7
  8. Mick O'Toon

    Mick O'Toon Well-Known Member

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    Why buy players if you're not going to play them? Asking for a friend.
     
    #8
  9. Dorty Dogbreath

    Dorty Dogbreath keeper of the glow

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    Meanwhile, Mitro levels for Fulham.
     
    #9
  10. Blue harvest

    Blue harvest Active Member

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    Joselu scored against them last week, so it's hardly the yard stick to measure by!
     
    #10
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  11. Hung Drawn and Quartered

    Hung Drawn and Quartered Well-Known Member

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    Gayle scores for West Brom
     
    #11
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  12. cronemeister

    cronemeister Well-Known Member

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    Don’t think anyone can complain about the red card tbh, pretty reckless tackle from behind which is a straight red all day. Arter should have walked on the same basis, whilst it wasn’t reckless it was a tackle from behind, cynical and calculated...at least Hayden went in with the intention of going for the ball, still no excuse tho.
     
    #12
  13. cronemeister

    cronemeister Well-Known Member

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    Have you seen the score tho? QPR are clearly ****e or having a mare of a day, I’m surprised West Brom’s keeper hasn’t scored as well!!
     
    #13
  14. Dorty Dogbreath

    Dorty Dogbreath keeper of the glow

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    That Kenedy needs shooting.
     
    #14
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  15. Prince Isak (GG)

    Prince Isak (GG) Well-Known Member

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    That was easily the worst performance I have seen under Rafa. We got a point because they are **** but for **** sake we sign no right back. Get yedlin injured who is ****. The manq comes in who can’t play football and then......:.. Hayden does that. **** me that was an awful performance. Oh and was Kenedy out on the last last night. What th actual **** he couldn’t pass a ball.

    Final mention for the ref he was awful.
     
    #15
  16. Rum & Black for 2

    Rum & Black for 2 Champion’s League Prediction League Champion
    Forum Moderator

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    Hopefully not by himself...he’d miss.
     
    #16
  17. Mick O'Toon

    Mick O'Toon Well-Known Member

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    Someone did that in Dallas already.
     
    #17
  18. jimileysbaldhead

    jimileysbaldhead Well-Known Member

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    Lee Harvey Ashley said he's innocent
     
    #18
  19. Dorty Dogbreath

    Dorty Dogbreath keeper of the glow

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    <laugh>
     
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  20. General Lee Speaking

    General Lee Speaking Well-Known Member

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    And in Los Angeles.
     
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