Seems like things have gone a bit off the boil since my last matchday thread against Fat Sham's lot, that being the start of a 4 game losing streak. Divvint worry lads and lasses, I'm back to save our season on the last day! Match details Toon vs Chelski SJP - kick off is at 3pm (all games kick off at the same time). The game has been selected by them there slags over at sky but kick off time remains the same Ref Watch Martin Atkinson - his last appearance for us was our home win over Huddersfield (same again please Martin). Team News Islami Slimani is suspended (dickhead) and has apparently returned to Leicester. Christian Atsu is sidelined following a knee operation Kenedy is not allowed to play with the ball against his parent club as per premier league loan rules. Fluffery Buffery Antonio Conte brings his Chelsea pensioners to SJP (seen below here posing for a team photo) for a final day show head to head. Both teams have quite a bit to play for, a Champions League place for Chelsea and some lovely moooolah for Big Fat Mike. Chelsea finishing fourth may still not be enough for them if Liverpool win the CL but they have to do their bit and hope. For us we could finish as high as 10th (our current position), or as low as 15th depending on results elsewhere, the difference between 10th and 15th is rumoured to be around £10m. The usual pitch parade is likely to follow the final whistle, regardless of the result I think the majority of fans will just be relieved to not be caught up in a relegation battle on the last day. 10th would be an absolutely phenomenal achievement given where we were at the turn of the year. The curtain coming down should hopefully also see the back of a number of our squad who are still stealing a living masquerading as a premier league footballer, Colback, Gayle, Manquillo, Joselu to name but a few. Seeing the back of Big Fat Mike will of course be top of a large portion of our fanbases wishlist for the summer along with Rafa signing a new contract...and hopefully a decent ****ing striker. My Prediction - we normally do well against Chelsea at home for some strange reason so I'm plumping for a 3-2 win to the Toon, Shelvey, Ritchie and Perez on the scoresheet for us. You will all be pleased to know that I will be firmly rooted to my sofa watching it from home and not venturing out to the pub, so if we lose it's someone else's fault (probably Chippy's). Enjoy your summers lads and lasses and be safe wherever you go and whatever you do, especially if you're venturing to Russia for some World Cup action....tarra forrabit.
Looking at the top photo, judging by the old fella's expression the woman must be flashing her cleavage at him.
They don't call ya Dorts for nuthin !! Think you're right though, he copping a right eyeful there, his mate on the left is being a nosey ****er anarl
If Chelsea win, and Liverpool lose they will get Champions League place regardless of whether Liverpool win CL. Can have up to 5 teams in CL now. Hopefully Liverpool go 2-0 up within 5mins completely deflating Chelsea players so we can repeat the 5-1 win over Spurs from last day 2 years ago.
Too many words for me. But on that basis I believe a well earned win by 1-0 or 2-1 for us will be the outcome. Also damned good thread my good man, damned good.
Hope so, but goals are going to be hard to come by for the Toon. No Kenedy, no Atsu, so I assume Murphy starting on the left and Ritchie on the right, or the other way round. The mighty Gayle and Perez up front. It's not a strong attack really. I wouldn't be opposed to Perez at no 9 and Merino playing behind.