Well, back from a lovely week in sunny Lanzarote. What did I miss? The "London is full of darkies" thread seems to have been the main thrust while I've been away, anything else worth a look at? Holiday was a week of staring at poontang, watching fat feckers go to town on the all you can eat buffet, bit more staring at poontang and generally looking down my nose at the riff-raff whilst laughing at myself for going on such a riff-raff themed holiday in the first place. Commenting on how ill-mannered the Germans, French and Dutch were then realizing the Brits were actually worse. Did I mention the poontang? Before you ask, no photos, sorry.
Never been, is it full of fat Northerners? The number of grotesque fatties chowing down at the all you can eat buffet was astounding. Entire families with plates piled high every meal as if breakfast, lunch and dinner was some sort of Man Vs Food contest. The novelty wore off pretty quick for me and by day two I was onto the fresh fish and salads at dinner, skipped most lunches and had muesli yoghurt and fruit for breakfast. Junior had 5 sausages and a pancake on the first day so we took the piss out of him but he soon realized this wasn't sustainable and stuck to cereal and toast for the rest of it. Football shirts aplenty; Liverpool - mostly Barcelona - plenty Man Utd - plenty Rangers - a few, no Celtic which was a surprise Single examples of the following; Sunderland Norwich Newcastle Chelskum Real Madrid PSG England Couple of Rugby shirts Munster Wigan Warriors Warrington Wolves It was the Wigan and Warrington lot that looked like something out of Embarrassing Bodies, "The Type Twos" as we affectionately referred to them.
You might know the family. Two kids both as specky as f.uck, older one with shaved head around the sides and a sticking up Tin Tin blonde bit on the top. Proper beer bottle bottom glasses on the pair of them. Could not verify number of fingers per hand.
A few Rangers shirts you say? Where the Lochries on their regular excursion to Lanz last week @The Chaser?
