Off Topic The Sullivan & Gold Comedy Corner

David Moyes says he's gained control of West Scam's future transfers

I can't wait to see how this plays out...

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His knee's gone, hasn't it?

They love an expensive crock/seasoned international, The Spammers. He'll fit right in.

 

An ex-West Scam trainee has been arrested for gambling with the hard-earned money of the taxpayer. Can't think where he learned that habit from...
http://www.espn.co.uk/football/west...-gambling-with-stolen-card?ex_cid=fw_affid267

 

Actually appeared in the first team, so rather more than a trainee..... Board and players on the same wavelength it seems

 

http://www.bbc.co.uk/sport/football/43132301

I assume they have exceeded the "home-grown"
quota for dopes (their board alone takes up 4 slots) .

 

Is there anything upright and decent about that joke of a club? Anything??

 

There’s 4 uprights on the pitch. Do they count?

 

West Ham have been charged by the Football Association in relation to anti-doping regulations...


... I didn’t realise that the FA were coming down so hard on clubs who are sending the fans to sleep.

 

BBC Gossip:

West Ham are ready to offer boss David Moyes a two-year deal in the summer if he keeps the Hammers in the Premier League - and the Scot is already looking at the vacancies section for next season. (Express)

* Slightly amended for the sake of accuracy

 

This time last year West Scam were linked with a move for Sporting midfielder Ruben Semedo, only to be snubbed in favour of Villarreal.

This afternoon a judge charged Semedo with attempted murder after he and a couple of his mates broke into someone's house, tied up the homeowner before working him over, before robbing him blind - while back in November he was in a spot of trouble for pulling a gun on a Valencia fan following a bar argument.

In other words they missed out on a potential club legend...

 

Ready made for them

 

Seasoned international nutter.

 

It is being reported that The Spammers have sold Jose Fonte to the Chinese, Daliyan Yifang.

Reports that Andy Carroll and Mark Noble have been sold to the Chinese, High Street Dagenham, are still unconfirmed.

 

A number 9 and a number 16, would that be sweet and sour chicken and a crispy duck?

 

There’s certainly a ‘dum(b)-sim(pleton) in there somewhere!

 

West Ham ... their fans must despair.
They turn up for most games v Spurs and Arsenal and half the games v Chelsea and United and are pretty much dogshite in the rest
If they bothered in all they'd be a top 6 or 7 team every year.
As it is though they could well go down if results go against them.

 

Most of their fans don’t have a sentient level sufficient to understand the concept of despair!

 

Words, once again, utterly fail me...

 

Yeah I saw that and couldn't even bring myself to copy and paste it- No words can express what I am thinking

 

I keep re-reading it hoping it will say something else but it never does. It never does.