I was in Glasgow one weekend for a Celtic home game... We decided to head out on the saturday night but I couldnt get in anywhere because I forgot to pack a pair of 'going out' shoes and was running around in a pair of reebok My mates went to a club and left me to go back to the hotel because they couldnt be ****ed running around anymore... But I got a really crazy idea and offered a homeless guy a fiver for his black socks... I pulled them over my trainers and they looked like black shoes... the bouncers hadnt a clue and let me in. Even though I have taken a lot of grief over it, I'm proud of my drunken accomplishment.
Sunny day on the beach, drinking since the early morning, BBQ etc, all very fine. It was getting on a bit so we decided to go to the cinema. By the time we got their it was 12ish. No one else there apart from us and we got kicked out because a guy working there got punched.
a mate was getting grief off this lad, so we lagered him up to fight him once pissed (as the guy is a pussy, 6 4 and 5ft acroos but a pussycat) the plan was to walk up to the fell, kick him in the baws as he was doubled over, knee him in the face, throw him into the hedges so he walks up to him gets kneed in the baws, kneed in th eface and thrown into the hedges
actually scratch that ST I just had a vision of you as that fat fighters bird played by matt lucas 'sorry what did you say'
Mrs' brother was working away in Oxford, him & some work mates went for a night out there after work, got absolutely battered & started talking about work.......one guy accused the other guy of slacking etc and a scuffle broke out. They get chucked out the club & the 2 lads are still having words, mrs brother is trying to calm them both down when old bill drive past. Coppers get out to see whats happening & calm the situation. They ask what everyone is doingnow, the 2 lads want to go to another club so walk up the road, mrs brother is quite clearly hammered so the coppers pull over a taxi for him & tell him to go home. He wakes up 2 hours later outside his house in Birmingham with the taxi driver demanding £150 Worst thing was his mrs was stopping at her mom & dads house & he had no keys for his house so had to sleep on the drive until the shop round the corner was open.....he'd through his phone against the wall in anger so had to go the shop to borrow the phone to ring his mrs. He had to get a train back to Oxford as he had the keys to the work van so nobody couldstart work till he got there He's a bit of a legend, will try & think of more of his stories.