Always Happens

Every sunday, after my traditional sunday roast I have a nice relaxing bath so I have a nice sleep before the ****ty week of work.

Then just before I drop off I feel the ****s coming & my nice clean arse gets ruined.

After advice from ML yesterday about bathing more than once a week I had a shower, now I've just had the dirties **** imaginable. You know when it does break cleanly away from your arse? Know matter how many times you wipe your arse there's still **** on your tissue.

This happens everytime I have a wash.

My ****s will be perfect now till sunday, then after my bath its back to dirty arse

 

Thanks for sharing that with us ya ****ing freak

 

Aye cheers Brum:

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Somewhere along the line you've gone so ****ing wrong Brum

 

buy some baby wipes and keep hem next to the toilet.

they are the best thing in the world when you have ring of fire. put them in the fridge if your expecting ring of fire. its the best treatment money can buy.

 

cant beat baby wipes! although i do know a guy why got them mixed up with flash bleach wipes which was a bit stingy

 

Its not really the ring of fire or Japanese Flag as I call it.

Its more a **** stained ring after having a bath that pisses me off.

 

Maybe those Flash bleach wipes are just what you need then Brum

 

You think I'm gonna walk round the office with baby wipes & head off to the toilet

 

everyone knws someone who has done that.

 

me n ma mate have had this conversation. non-wipers are a god send, thats the clean ****s that only require 1 wipe but we call them non-wipers cos the 1st wipe is spotless. the ****s ur talkin about happen to me after av eaten a curry or junk food. ****in murder!

please tell me u wash every day tho?

 

Just dont sit them next to the Dairylea Slices, or you might end up in a right ****in mess!

 

why not?

 

Have we all become coprophiliacs today?

 

Its worse than the birds who carry their great big **** off bags to the toilets a few days every month so they can change their fanny rags.

I don't wont folk walking past me with baby wipes & heading to the toilet. There's some rightfat ****ing states here who I'd keep having nightmares about, picturing them straining & wiping their arses.

 

I got to the toilet with the daily star and baby oil

 

some days its rape, somedays its midgets, somedays its crank texts/email and today its ****.

welcome to not606

 

That should be the new slogan on the banner

 

no news on those texts by the way altho ma mate was tellin me he's gony start textin this woman who once thot his number was her son's. she's textin "wait til u get home ur father is furious!" and he's textin back "**** you ya old cow and **** dad aswell am out of here"

she foned him up and called him a **** head

 

Aye sums this place up beautifully!