Masturbating Spider watched me whilst I showered

She had a sink in her room at university. Invariably the copious amounts of beer I'd drunk the night before would attack my bladder in the middle of the night and it was easier to piss in the sink than go to the communal bogs. Fortunately she was always so shagged out after a fierce rogering from Stan that she never caught me.

 

****! I never thought of that, Lightening!


A few times, I jizzed in her sock. Or the gusset of her panties.

I was never comfortable about whipping it out and jizzing over her, since it was invariably the case that the jizz would run onto the bed-sheets, or she'd roll over and smear the entire load all over the duvet - the filthy cow!

I was funny like that, Stan. Still am, I suppose.

 

Taken a slash in a wardrobe once. I'd just moved into a new place that I was renting years ago. Had been out on the lash to celebrate. Woke up in the night needing a piss and was too drunk to find the bathroom. Found a door which I thought was the toilet and took a slash in there, turned out it was a built in wardrobe. Fortunately I hadn't unpacked any of my belongings.

 

HIAG still has his sock

 

Jay Tab must have a ring piece like a plasterers radio.

 

Admit it, Pix.

You're talking about the cupboard under your old Mum's stairs, aren't you, mate?

 

Again the cupboard under the stairs Bell is that where mummy put you after she found her crispy flannel?

 

No, Skids.

It's the cupboard under Pixie's Mum's stairs where he often ****s, alone in the dark.

That wasn't one of my findings, but that of a Gooner. Pixie will remember his name.

 

I thought the crispy flannel was a pet name for his missus.

 

Was your jizz sock named Saintsfan08?

 

Skids' nickname for his missus is "The Horn."

What's your missus' nickname, Pix? I bet it's something like "Giggles" on account of the fact that she's always laughing at you, in bed. Am I right, mate?

 

I didn't use the same sock ffs!


And why the **** would I give it a name???

 

Can't believe HIAG had spent all these years denying that he's got a sock, to then admit that he jizzes all over it.

 

So you jizzed in socks that you actually wear?
Or did you buy socks purely to jizz in?

 

Steady on Bell don't get all defensive mate! That's the third time in a day you've mentioned 'under the stairs'. It clearly is or has been an issue in your life also the crispy flannels. Anybody who had studied SF ould agree you make a great case history for students to examine.

 

Now Now, you shouldn't judge HIAG, until you have walked a mile in his Jizz socks!

 

Look, it wasn't a regular occurrence, okay!

On a few occasions, I jizzed in a sock. It would probably have been a sock that either I (or the girlfriend) would have been wearing immediately prior to my fist-pumping my load into it.

It's not as though I was doing anything deviant ffs!

 

Not deviant, funny though.
I can hardly talk, I jizzed in an inflatable sheep!

Was your girlfriend aware that you used to bolt your load into her socks?

 

So long as they don't put that on your gravestone, mate, you'll be fine!

Oh, yes! Painfully aware!

First time it happened, I actually thought it was mine, and her reaction was one of horror and disgust (not that my jizzing on her tits would have caused her to bat an eyelid, of course). When we both discovered that I'd milked myself into one of her socks, she made me buy her a new pair!

I remember saying to her, "If I'd jizzed in your hair, you wouldn't insist on me buying you a ****ing wig, you silly mare!"

We learned to laugh about, later.