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If they weren't footballers.............

Discussion in 'Newcastle United' started by Minty Fresh, Aug 16, 2011.

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  1. Oh Titus She Said No

    Oh Titus She Said No New Member

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    Jonas - Pirate
    Cabaye - Model/Actor
    Barton - Nazi prison officer
    Best - Drake
    Guthrie - Sports Direct
    Tiote - Obama's body guard
    Pardew - Dodgy car salesman
    Ba - Security guard for Best
    Williamson - Interior designer
    Raylor - Mechanic
    Saylor - Taxi driver
    Krul - Bar
    Simpson - Bank
    Lovenkrands - Butcher
    Sameobi - Selling stuff on the beach
    Shola - Party thrower
    Coloccini - Hair dresser
    Gosling - Waiter
    Ferguson - Paperboy
     
    #21
    Oh Titus She Said No, Aug 16, 2011
  2. Andmcit

    Andmcit Member

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    Saylor: Zombie film extra:

    please log in to view this image
    [/IMG]
     
    #22
    Andmcit, Aug 16, 2011
  3. Albert's Chip Shop

    Albert's Chip Shop Top Grafter
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    Steve Bruce - extra in horror movies
    Ryan Giggs- porn star
    Wayne Rooney - would be a typical scouser still (i.e. no job)
     
    #23
    Albert's Chip Shop, Aug 16, 2011
  4. Tiggyrimana

    Tiggyrimana Active Member

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    Krul - Waiter
    Simmo - Backup dancer for **** women artists (Miss Spears ect)
    Taylor - Bouncer
    Colo - Milkman
    Raylor - Mcdonalds
    Barton - Front man of a failed Morrisey tribute band
    Cabaye - Leading Hollywood actor
    Tiote - President of the world
    Jonas - Holiday Rep
    Ameobi - Are you smarter than a 10yr old
    Ba - Hotdog stall
     
    #24
    Tiggyrimana, Aug 16, 2011
  5. aginairrr

    aginairrr Active Member

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    Williamson is definitely an electrician or plumber!
     
    #25
    aginairrr, Aug 16, 2011
  6. Darth Gogledd

    Darth Gogledd Well-Known Member

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    These all look rather probable.
     
    #26
    Darth Gogledd, Aug 16, 2011
  7. Smudger

    Smudger Active Member

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    Pardew - dodgy car salesman
    Williamson - working in accounting or something, definitely an office job
    Coloccini - man-whore/pornstar
     
    #27
    Smudger, Aug 16, 2011
  8. daveynufc

    daveynufc Active Member

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    DAMN IT... I go through the WHOLE thread, and the VERY last post is the one I was gonna say for Colo :(

    Raylor in McDonalds is a good shout earlier
    Saylor- Pannellist on "would I lie to you?"
    Lover - Scottish accent trainer
    Tiote - Everything... at the same time
    Obertan - Actor (Sci Fi)
    Jonas - Masked crime fighting superhero (obviously)
    Cissokho - Jaws
    Barton - English teacher
     
    #28
    daveynufc, Aug 16, 2011
  9. The Kettle

    The Kettle New Member

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    Enrique - plays Tuco in the remake of The Good, The Bad, and The Ugly.
     
    #29
    The Kettle, Aug 16, 2011
  10. Andmcit

    Andmcit Member

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    Barton - vindictive army drill sergeant? motivator
    Raylor - mime artist
    Collo - surfy/lifegaurd
     
    #30
    Andmcit, Aug 16, 2011

  11. Gutierrez's Right Boot

    Gutierrez's Right Boot Well-Known Member

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    Harper a referee (oh wait)
     
    #31
    Gutierrez's Right Boot, Aug 16, 2011
  12. SafehandsOleSoderberg

    SafehandsOleSoderberg Member

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    Harper - Very Patient supply teacher
    Simpson - Failed Youtube vlogger
    Taylor - Acting Coach specialising in being shot
    Coloccini - Male Gigolo
    Raylor - Still lives with parents, yet to 'come out of his shell'
    Barton - George Orwell fanatic, occasionally gets airtime on Radio 4 for his 'quote of the week'
    Cabaye - Vampire in Twilight
    Tiote - Still a footballer - you don't joke about Tiote.
    Obertan - Shop assistant, good at getting things off the top shelf for old ladies.
    Demba Ba - Sends e-mails claiming he's a prince who would like to share his riches for just a small initial donation.
    Shola Ameobi - Hat model
    Nile Ranger - Currently unemployed but did nick a huge bag of Basmati rice from Tesco last week.
     
    #32
    SafehandsOleSoderberg, Aug 16, 2011
  13. MKTOONER

    MKTOONER Member

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    Harper - A professional wrestler
     
    #33
    MKTOONER, Aug 16, 2011
  14. AH

    AH Active Member

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    Jonas would be scuba diver instructor, a la Hank Azaria in Along Came Polly
     
    #34
    AH, Aug 16, 2011
  15. aginairrr

    aginairrr Active Member

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    The people's elbow against Arsenal last season was quality!
     
    #35
    aginairrr, Aug 16, 2011
  16. Amnesiac

    Amnesiac Guest

    Steve Bruce - Pat Butcher stunt double
     
    #36
    Amnesiac, Aug 16, 2011
  17. Eat Sleep Watch F1 Repeat

    Eat Sleep Watch F1 Repeat Active Member

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    Haha yeah he got caught in the act in theboat with the other guy's missus. Think he is more like Colo.
     
    #37
    Eat Sleep Watch F1 Repeat, Aug 16, 2011
  18. jimileysbaldhead

    jimileysbaldhead Well-Known Member

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    Ashley- stunt double for Mr. Creosote(with a bit of luck)
     
    #38
    jimileysbaldhead, Aug 16, 2011
  19. Darth Gogledd

    Darth Gogledd Well-Known Member

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    So Ashley is the one to explode...(please)
     
    #39
    Darth Gogledd, Aug 16, 2011
  20. Ameobi's Apprentice

    Ameobi's Apprentice Active Member

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    Simmo - HMV
    Saylor - Plummer
    Colo - Gay model
    Raylor - Call centre but is currently on sick leave as he suffers from depression.
    Barton - detective
    Cabaye - Lawyer
    Jonas - Porn director
    Shola - auditioning for britains got talent, claiming he can wear more than 3 hats at a time, but after failing in his previous 5 auditions he decides to take up porn and gets his big break in one of Jonas's movies 'Bone in the wind' his porn name is Shola Shlong
     
    #40
    Ameobi's Apprentice, Aug 16, 2011
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