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If they weren't footballers.............

Discussion in 'Newcastle United' started by Minty Fresh, Aug 16, 2011.

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  1. Minty Fresh

    Minty Fresh Active Member

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    What jobs would our players be doing?

    My ideas:

    Shola - Hat designer
    Ben Arfa - French/Geordie relations (that basically is his job at the moment)
    Ba - Shrimping boat captain
    Tiote - God
     
    #1
    Minty Fresh, Aug 16, 2011
  2. Spiderman-Mask

    Spiderman-Mask Well-Known Member

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    Cabaye - Male Model
     
    #2
    Spiderman-Mask, Aug 16, 2011
  3. MKTOONER

    MKTOONER Member

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    Cabaye - Model
     
    #3
    MKTOONER, Aug 16, 2011
  4. simonbh7

    simonbh7 Active Member

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    Barton...........doing time
    Colo.............hairdresser
    Cabaye.........male model
    S Taylor...............failed actor
    Ranger....................failed gangster
     
    #4
    simonbh7, Aug 16, 2011
  5. Spiderman-Mask

    Spiderman-Mask Well-Known Member

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    Snap! <laugh>
     
    #5
    Spiderman-Mask, Aug 16, 2011
  6. MKTOONER

    MKTOONER Member

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    Beat me to it
     
    #6
    MKTOONER, Aug 16, 2011
  7. Beatski

    Beatski Well-Known Member

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    #7
    Beatski, Aug 16, 2011
  8. overseasTOON

    overseasTOON Active Member

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    Jonas - Waving instructor
    Raylor - Do you want fries with that? (one star out of five)
    Barton - 10 years (no parole)
    Pardew - Double glazing salesman
    Simpson - Web developer
    Tiote - Emperor of Earth and it's surrounding areas (within 3000 light years)
     
    #8
    overseasTOON, Aug 16, 2011
  9. I Sit Next To A Badger-Leazes Corner

    I Sit Next To A Badger-Leazes Corner Well-Known Member

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    Krul - Glove designer
    Simpson - Unemployed and rioting
    Cabaye - my bit on the side
    Ba - Night shift in a petrol station
    Shola - Hat designer/human sleeping pill
    Gutierrez - 24hr dancer
    Tiote - Cage fighter
    Guthrie - Asda
    Saylor - Sailor
    Joey Barton - Comedian
     
    #9
    I Sit Next To A Badger-Leazes Corner, Aug 16, 2011
  10. Jock McMagpie

    Jock McMagpie Active Member

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    Joey.......Looting co-ordinator
    Ben Arfa........Careers Advisor
    Colo.......Actor (currently performing in "the simpsons" the musical in the west end as Sideshow Bob)
     
    #10
    Jock McMagpie, Aug 16, 2011

  11. simonbh7

    simonbh7 Active Member

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    Jonas.................speedo-wearing speed boat owner who makes a living in Ibiza towing tourists behind his boat on a big inflatable banana
     
    #11
    simonbh7, Aug 16, 2011
  12. Eat Sleep Watch F1 Repeat

    Eat Sleep Watch F1 Repeat Active Member

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    Sammy Ameobi - The City's love rat
    please log in to view this image
     
    #12
    Eat Sleep Watch F1 Repeat, Aug 16, 2011
  13. I Sit Next To A Badger-Leazes Corner

    I Sit Next To A Badger-Leazes Corner Well-Known Member

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    <laugh>
     
    #13
    I Sit Next To A Badger-Leazes Corner, Aug 16, 2011
  14. Minty Fresh

    Minty Fresh Active Member

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    I'm guessing Williamson would be working in an office or something.....
     
    #14
    Minty Fresh, Aug 16, 2011
  15. Why aye Cabaye

    Why aye Cabaye Active Member

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    Tim Krul - call centre
    Danny Simpson - wannabe club/events promotor
    Taylor - HGV driver
    Colo - cirucs act (can't see that hair in every day society)
    Barton - Brick layer
    Tiote - Aircraft tug at Ivory Coasts main airport (he doesn't need a vehicle, he pushes the planes himself)
    Cabaye - as others have said, or barrister.
    Jonas - in the porn industry
    Ameobi - street cleaner
    Ba - Cattle hearder
    Williamson - farmer
    R. Taylor - Samaritans volunteer
    Ferguson - student.....
    Best - slaughter house worker
    Guthrie - plasterer
    Gosling - carpenter
    Lovenkrands - captaining a tourist boat on the fjords
    Harper - Armed forces
    The other french players - n/a, all on strike.
     
    #15
    Why aye Cabaye, Aug 16, 2011
  16. overseasTOON

    overseasTOON Active Member

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    Sam Allardyce - still a ****
     
    #16
    overseasTOON, Aug 16, 2011
  17. Minty Fresh

    Minty Fresh Active Member

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    <laugh>
     
    #17
    Minty Fresh, Aug 16, 2011
  18. Amnesiac

    Amnesiac Guest

    That's a bit wrong, I mean yeah he's great and everything but God aint no Tiote!
     
    #18
    Amnesiac, Aug 16, 2011
  19. overseasTOON

    overseasTOON Active Member

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    Scene: Jonas rings the doorbell. A woman wearing scanty clothing opens it and smiles. Jonas waves. Her clothes fall of.

    *wahwah guitar starts*
     
    #19
    overseasTOON, Aug 16, 2011
  20. Eat Sleep Watch F1 Repeat

    Eat Sleep Watch F1 Repeat Active Member

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    <laugh>
     
    #20
    Eat Sleep Watch F1 Repeat, Aug 16, 2011
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