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Spurlock's Ramadan diary

Discussion in 'The Premier League' started by Spurlock, Jun 9, 2016.

  1. Tel (they/them)

    Tel (they/them) Sucky’s Bailiff

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    Just realised that Booths is only up this way... <doh>
     
    #1101
  2. Burly Hurley

    Burly Hurley Well-Known Member

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    My wife doesn't trust no one. EVER!! <laugh>

    If she finds a supplier she trusts it's like the place gets to say Suppliers to the Crown and can post a crown on their packaging! She gives them such a hard time! <laugh>

    She'll very occasionally buy halal chicken from Tesco's but for some reason there's still reluctance there.

    It could be because she's moved away from her own patch where her immediate family bought from family or friends, and it's taking some time good her to gain trust.

    But 16 years on? I just think she likes being stroppy in the butchers!
     
    #1102
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  3. DUNCAN DONUTS

    DUNCAN DONUTS SOCIAL JUSTICE WARRIOR

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    I hope Spurlock starts hearing Allah in his head and decides to blow himself up <ok>
     
    #1103
  4. Highburyal

    Highburyal Cun.t Chops

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    I dont blame her though, i never buy any meat products from bog stores, butchers mate. The fishes come from the fish mongers, never buy that stuff from super stores, fruit and veg from local fruit and veg shop as much as possible.
     
    #1104
  5. Spurlock

    Spurlock Homeboy
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    please log in to view this image
     
    #1105
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  6. Burly Hurley

    Burly Hurley Well-Known Member

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    Wow. Really?
     
    #1106
  7. Deleted #

    Deleted # Well-Known Member

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    Thanks for that mate.

    I've got a lot of respect for putting yourself through it for a month. I love me scran and it would absolutely buckle me, so fair play to all you guys for staying so committed.

    When do you sleep if you are praying through the night? Suppose you cut back on expense with the herb for a month lol.

    Respecta
     
    #1107
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  8. deedub93

    deedub93 Well-Known Member

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    Beware of free range chicken. I've worked on a number of rehabilitated landfills and people farm chickens on them. Who knows what contaminants they manage to eat.
     
    #1108
  9. Deleted #

    Deleted # Well-Known Member

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    The only girl I've ever loved was an Indian girl called Amarjeet. Absolutely gorgeous, she was working as a home care nurse when we met. I used to go around with my bag of cans after she put the old ******ed woman to bed. I used to smash her and leave at 5 in the morning before it got light and the shift change over happened. One night I was drilling Ama on the settee and the old woman came shuffling through in her nappy making mad noises so I had to stop mid motion and get Ama to put her back to her bed. If the old woman could have talked we would have been in deep ****. I know how bad that sounds, it's horrific when I think back now but I was young, daft and naive.

    Her dad found out and that was the end of it. She was kept in her bedroom and he was ringing in sick for her at work. She was threatened with being sent to India if she got back with me. We called it a day then. She's a nurse now working in a hospital in Telford, she's married an Indian dude. I still think something will happen again between us. Not sure when, where or how. It will happen though.

    Mental ****.
     
    #1109
  10. Spurlock

    Spurlock Homeboy
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    Cheers for the kind words brudda.

    I've had my scram and my last biff...just waiting on prayers(around 3am)which only lasts 15 minutes I reckon...then bed. It messes with my sleep..my month slows down...I book a fair few days off work...like to take it easy on myself, a bit of family time..the Spliffs have decreased, the affect is just as good...buzzin now...some secureteam10 UFO vids on YouTube will see me through to my prayer.
     
    #1110
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  11. Deleted #

    Deleted # Well-Known Member

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    Thanks again mate.

    About why pork is haram. One of the muslim lads around my way once told me it was because they were known as a dirty animal that rolled about in its own ****.

    Was he just full of ****?
     
    #1111
  12. thefanwithnoname

    thefanwithnoname Well-Known Member

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    Truth is Muslims are practising or aware to certain levels, so rather than saying "I don't know" or looking into it they come out with some answer or another. My favourite is we pray because its good exercise. Yeah OK then.
     
    #1112
  13. thefanwithnoname

    thefanwithnoname Well-Known Member

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    Not really tbh. I spent most of my life in UK and never really had the places where I lived and grew up.

    When visiting my land of ancestors they never let me but its done in your own house pretty much.

    I know the theory but but the practise. Did go to learn once with a relative. Should have started small and gone with someone who knew what they were doing. He started with a grown goat and wasn't very good. Traumatised me. Well until thecgoat curry was made later that evening nom nom
     
    #1113
  14. Deleted #

    Deleted # Well-Known Member

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    Good exercise! That's a first one on me, I've never heard that before <laugh>
     
    #1114
  15. thefanwithnoname

    thefanwithnoname Well-Known Member

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    Surprised you haven't tbh. If I had a penny for every time I heard that I would be a gazillionaire.


    Of course there was always a bit of wumming with our non Muslim bredren too. So 4 wives was because we had high sex drives etc and one woman couldn't cope. Amazing what teenagers will believe
     
    #1115
  16. Deleted #

    Deleted # Well-Known Member

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    I think the Geordie Muslims do things different up here.

    Have you ever heard a Geordie Muslim speak before? Lol
     
    #1116
  17. thefanwithnoname

    thefanwithnoname Well-Known Member

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    Known a few Geordie's in my time. Went to uni with one who was part of the crew but never met a Geordie Muslim.

    Knew a couple of Sikh Geordie lasses but never a Muslim. Never thought about it until you mentioned it
     
    #1117
  18. Deleted #

    Deleted # Well-Known Member

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    I used to crack up mate. No idea why cos it's the same accent as I've got. When your used to just hearing the older blokes in the shop growing up and then all of a sudden you see the younguns talking just like me, it seemed a bit surreal for some reason.

    Same as when I pass through Bensham, in Gateshead. That is Jew central in Europe, they don't sound right either when they talk Geordie. No reason why they shouldn't. They are born and bred around here.

    There's one particular Jew around there who is well known for ****ing off non Jewish lads.

    Nowt more queer than folk.
     
    #1118
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  19. Bodinki

    Bodinki You're welcome
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    Not much of a social justice warrior are you?
     
    #1119
  20. DUNCAN DONUTS

    DUNCAN DONUTS SOCIAL JUSTICE WARRIOR

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    Surprised you didn't rape the the old lady
     
    #1120

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