Thread ender - right here ........ when you get to 60, just after your birthday, you get your own ''stool'' sampling kit - for three days on the trot you get a handful of ''stool'' and using the enclosed cardboard stick you take a little sample of said ''stool'' and smear it over it over two cellophane windows set into a piece of cardboard, two more days, four more dabs of ''stool'' sees you post it off to some poo smelling laboratory in the far north to be sampled for bowel disease, repeat every two years! You're now officially old ...... bet you can't wait eh? Just so you 59 year old's recognise it ..... no need to thank me
Twice I haven't sent those back as I was in hospital and it slipped my mind. Seeing my medical records it states "Refused to partake in stool sample test" or words to that effect as though you are some reactionary non conformist. One tip, don't have Guinness and mushy peas the night before.
Certainly is - made worse in that none of your so-called mates. who are already 60, have given you a heads up on what's to come. I feel I'm doing a public service here!
I've been doing these every couple of years since I turned 40. Quite pleasurable & very important. As is the prostate examination. (The pleasure can drop a little depending on the examiner - As a rule, if the Doc is over 6 foot do your best to relax.) Don't be beaten by embarrassment, these tests can save your lives. What's not to like?
I'm due my third one later in the year - for 63 I feel as fit and well as I've felt in years, I hope to stay that way a good while longer - ergo, I have no problem with that^ or any other test.
Sorry SSS, my message reads as if it's directed at you. It was just a general one. I've had 5 Prostates exams, by far the one I was most uncomfortable with was carried out by a young female Doc. I just laid there in the fetal position thinking of Hilda Ogden.
No worries mate - you've got the message out. Despite my painting it worse than it actually is, for humours sake, it's really a simple test as you say; if completed it gives loads of early warning of what has now become a regularly cured form of cancer. Embarrassment never killed anyone.
That just shows what a state the NHS is in, I suppose in the old days it would have been a job for the YTS or the apprentice. A real shortage of staff so you have to do things yourself. Only joking I know better than most how good they are at sorting emergencies, the pre and post stuff leaves a bit to be desired so anything we can do to help early diagnosis has to be a good thing
you know youre getting old when your optimism goes and you end up hoping the worst will happen so you can say "I told you so!"
Couple of months older than you, and I still can't believe it, where the hell did that come from I keep saying to myself. Mentally still somewhere inside I'm 35 so I think and keep telling myself, but my wife and kids keep reminding me how much I'm getting to look like my older brother, that's my 17 year older brother. And they're right. Not good, not good at all. You can be an old youngster and an young oldie, I'll go for the latter please.
I'm only 42 but I've been ****ting in an envelope and putting it in the post for years. Normally addressed to a Mr E Allam...
I always find the hard bit's getting the ****e on the stick without getting it all over your hands or the toilet seat. All suggestions welcome but no photos thank you.
