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Tips

Discussion in 'General Chat' started by stopmeandslapme, Jan 12, 2017.

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  1. Archers Road

    Archers Road Urban Spaceman

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    I won a massive wedge on a Longchamp yankee once. Got weighed out in cash, went back into the battle cruiser where I had just watched David Beckham score the goal vs Greece that put England into the 2002 WC finals, walked up to the bar, pulled the lot out and said to the landlady "buy everyone a drink". What a Billy Big Bollocks **** I was that day. Word spreads fast, within minutes every coke dealer in the parish had decended on my local. Woke up the next morning with £40 left, and not even an unlicked wrap to cluck on. Put the lot on Sakhee, who won the Arc at 6/4, pissed that away too. Happy ****ing days.
     
    #81
    Archers Road, Jan 13, 2017
    Null likes this.
  2. Girvan Loyal 1690

    Girvan Loyal 1690 Nobody's safe now

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    Sometimes yeah. Mostly a good **** tho <ok>
     
    #82
    Girvan Loyal 1690, Jan 13, 2017
    Void likes this.
  3. Girvan Loyal 1690

    Girvan Loyal 1690 Nobody's safe now

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    <party> salt of the earth ^^
     
    #83
    Girvan Loyal 1690, Jan 13, 2017
    Archers Road likes this.
  4. Black Caviar

    Black Caviar 1 of the top judges in Europe

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    .
     
    #84
    Last edited: Nov 2, 2021
    Black Caviar, Jan 13, 2017
  5. Girvan Loyal 1690

    Girvan Loyal 1690 Nobody's safe now

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    Did you pay cash?
     
    #85
    Girvan Loyal 1690, Jan 13, 2017
  6. Black Caviar

    Black Caviar 1 of the top judges in Europe

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    #86
    Last edited: Nov 2, 2021
    Black Caviar, Jan 13, 2017
    Ciaran, User Deleted, Toby and 1 other person like this.

  7. Girvan Loyal 1690

    Girvan Loyal 1690 Nobody's safe now

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    Has edge snaked any of you yet?
     
    #87
    Girvan Loyal 1690, Jan 13, 2017
    Black Caviar likes this.
  8. GroveRanger

    GroveRanger Well-Known Member

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    I'll give you all a tip. Don't cry your eyes out when your boss gives you the sack. Man up and deal with it. See other thread for not much more detail.
     
    #88
    GroveRanger, Jan 13, 2017
  9. pompeymeowth

    pompeymeowth Prepare for trouble x Staff Member

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    PTL is obviously a mystery to you then.

    Come in my shop and I'll give you up to 2G on short prices after 11am.
     
    #89
    pompeymeowth, Jan 13, 2017
  10. Deleted #

    Deleted # Well-Known Member

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    Whenever I go for food or my hair cut. I pay the bill and tip a 5a. I don't want to look a mess and I don't want jizz in my food.

    Everybody else can go **** themselves. Nobody stands outside my office giving me money every time I go home.

    Edit: Escorts a tenna.
     
    #90
    Deleted #, Jan 13, 2017
    Ciaran, Gambol and Archers Road like this.
  11. seabreeze

    seabreeze Well-Known Member

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    Everyone gets the same tip from me " Plant your rice early "
     
    #91
    seabreeze, Jan 13, 2017
  12. Girvan Loyal 1690

    Girvan Loyal 1690 Nobody's safe now

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    How can a chef jizz in your food if you don't tip? Will he have to chase you down the street stick his fingers down your throat until you throw the food up then **** on it or wot m8?
     
    #92
    Girvan Loyal 1690, Jan 13, 2017
    pompeymeowth and stopmeandslapme like this.
  13. Deleted #

    Deleted # Well-Known Member

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    Yeah should have elaborated on that.

    There's only 2 places I regularly visit, so I'm known to them and I like to keep them sweet <ok>
     
    #93
    Deleted #, Jan 13, 2017
  14. Girvan Loyal 1690

    Girvan Loyal 1690 Nobody's safe now

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    10% for this bear. Then round it up
     
    #94
    Girvan Loyal 1690, Jan 13, 2017
    Deleted and Ciaran like this.
  15. Gambol

    Gambol George Clooney's wee brother

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    My dad gave me the same advice. Although he said seed. By that I think he meant spunk but av never been sure.
     
    #95
    Gambol, Jan 13, 2017
    pompeymeowth likes this.
  16. GroveRanger

    GroveRanger Well-Known Member

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    Sounds like something off of GC Uncut. Irate Chef Jizz Tip Revenge Porn, a little bit niche though, I couldn't find any images to suit.
     
    #96
    GroveRanger, Jan 16, 2017
  17. Girvan Loyal 1690

    Girvan Loyal 1690 Nobody's safe now

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    You're not looking hard enough
     
    #97
    Girvan Loyal 1690, Jan 16, 2017
  18. GroveRanger

    GroveRanger Well-Known Member

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    I will give it a go, check out uncut.
     
    #98
    GroveRanger, Jan 16, 2017
  19. stopmeandslapme

    stopmeandslapme Well-Known Member

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    Don't think I'll bother.
     
    #99
    stopmeandslapme, Jan 16, 2017
    Archers Road likes this.
  20. The Anilingus Aficionado

    The Anilingus Aficionado Official POTY 2011, 2014, 2015, 2018 & 2023

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    How would I snake anyone? You're the one crawling through Facebook finding users profiles and also the one who suggested a Whatsapp group but are too scared to join.

    You are a fat **** truth be told.
     
    #100
    The Anilingus Aficionado, Jan 17, 2017
    Toby, Void and Girvan Loyal 1690 like this.
Page 5 of 6
: Gough tipped young boy with ginger cock, Walter tipped hat as Gough ploughed preteen anus, latest victim tip of Gough abuse iceberg, reports suggest Gough ordered lavish room service, during kids 14 hour ordeal in Holiday Inn, Scotland Yard tipped off by Wallace as, Gough still on the loose, Gough yelled 'sevco till I die' as he, released 7 victims in a field near Motherwell

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