Peace in Our Time

I got a phone call from some guy called Tony, he wants me to broker a peace deal between the rebels and the ruling factors of the PL board because they are "acting like a bunch of girls"

They sent me this...

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and this...

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And a **** load of cash that I can keep even if I do a **** job, I'm also allowed a gun and 2 tanks but **** all air support as it's a bit tied up at the moment (****ers).

So basically I'm now the *official peace keeping force on this board and if I **** it all up or make it worse it doesn't matter, Tony told me a story about his **** ups and I wont even get close to that.

So you bitches are to respect my authority! (Cartman joke).

*may not actually be official

 

Sniff yer Ma

 

I'm going to put a curfew in place to discourage this kind of behaviour, nobody on the board between 4.30 am and 5.30 am, offenders will be restrained and thrown in a cell.

 

You know where I stand with ceasefires. Its up to you Kofi, either you call a spade a spade or man picking up his Glock.


Allah O Akbar.

 

So how do feel about heading up the new government once I'm done with this ****?

 

Why would you be done with it? Your idea!

 

I'm just here to sort it all out, once I decide I'm done I just **** off and leave you all to it again. I just have to install some crazed meglomaniac as leader and that's pretty much it, that's what Tony said anyway.

 

That's the time that the Garage Dwelling Failure likes to cut and paste the early edition of the Daily Fascist.

 

Do one, Neville.

 

I think he gets up that early because the accountancy business is not doing so well and he has forcibly taken over some paper delivery jobs to make up the shortfall, and in the process caused a number of paper boys/girls to be made redundant as he has undercut them. He only delivers right-wing papers though.

 

I need someone for propaganda, do you have his phone number?

 

My money would be on Mideast peace before it would go on not 606 Premier League peace ....

 

I'm going to do a top job Roofy I'll have everyone in line within a week. If not then **** it I'll wander back to own board and leave you all too it.

 

It's on his website.

 

So I need some rules.

1. Curfew 4.30am to 5.30am
2. No HAIG baiting
3. Fosse is now head of State and in charge of the day to day running of the board
4. Spurlock is president elect and will rule once I leave

More rules to follow.

 

Tubby only does sensible propaganda...

 

If you need any help with policies, this is pretty comprehensive

http://www.thesensibleparty.org.uk/page3.html

 

Looks a bit sensible, I'm thinking more death camps and hard labour.

 

5. All religions will merge into one, we'll call it Islamahinduanity
6. No Irish I can't understand a ****ing word.
7. No pets
8. Breakfast is 8-10.30

 

The Sensible Party would definitely support both policies. Pretty much anything Adolf was up for is OK by Tubby.