Same thing here mate except I was the one that was pissed up and once i'd started trying to boot her back door in and realizing that I needed something to ease the way, the only thing within easy reach was a bottle of head and shoulders but it did work and she's cured of dandruff
I once was working away, staying in a hotel, probably around 2005 I had a night out with a bird I'd got chatting to, nowt happened, just a little kiss on the cheek. Then I got back to my hotel and I had a text off her on my phone that said "I wish you could see how wet you've made me"... so I replied "So do I"... then about 5 mins later, a video of herself double dildo-ing... little samsung phone, could barely see owt so I sent a taxi to pick her up and she turned up at my hotel with a bag full of toys and a butt plug up her hoop and I went HAM on her for about 4 hours. The next morning she was starkers, on the bed, as I was jumping out of the shower, so thought I'd have another shot, turns out that butt plug was needed the night before to loosen her up, she nearly screamed the ****ing hotel down.
The funniest part for me was that I was that pissed I couldn't hit the target with the shampoo, it was up her back and down her legs and even on the floor where I was standing. I was like Todd Carty when he made a twat of him self on that skating show. I wouldn't exactly call it riding her, it was more a case of me hanging on for dear life
No mate, not porking her, I was playing with all her toys on her. She was a gusher... thankfully the hotel room had 2 double beds.
I looked at her on Facebook recently, she's all innocent and "I love my dog"... Her fella is some dorky mech engineer. I know she loves double anal and she's a nympho sub slut though.
Absolutely not mate, I wouldn't suggest that for one minute. It does make you think though, when you're in the supermarket for example, they're not always easy to spot. I find myself wondering if every lady has a bag of dildo's now.
I wish I had shares in the Rampant Rabbit mate. I once had a bird back to my apartment here in Africa, did the business overnight and arranged for her to stay in the apartment and told her I would be nipping back at lunchtime for a matinee session. She called at 10:00 in the morning asking me to bring AA batteries. When I got back to my apartment here was this huge dildo lying in bits waiting for me to bring fresh batteries. When I say huge, this thing could have dug paving stones up no problem, it was 12 inches long FFS. I put the batteries in and fired it up and it rattled out of my hand and wriggled around the floor with me stood there in amazement. Talk about shock, stunned and amazed? the ****ing furniture was rattling. Anyway, she set to work with it and I may as well have went back to work cos the lights were on but no one was home. Horny as **** though.
On the BBC news site, there is an Australian bloke who beats Jimmy saville 900 and counting, he impersonated Justin beiber so he will get sued and get life in jail.
Plot twist: this is correct, turns out 'she' was born male and has a big ol' dick swinging around down there. Couple of things that were brought up here do confuse the issue, specifically if a woman drugged a man to have sex with him then that's rape to my mind, as is Lauren Laverne (or the lady of your choice) going in dry with a strap on. Not sure how the law defines a penis in that case.
If a woman gave me drugs and raped me, i'd call that Christmas mate especially if it was Lauren Laverne (without the strap on)
**** me!!! that's gruesome mate, was thinking more like this myself like. please log in to view this image
Speaking of sexual behaviour without consent... Rat faced piece of **** Adam Johnson has notched up his first year in prison, or thereabouts. I hope he celebrates by having an arse-cake pushed into his mouth and his head set on fire.
